Syndeo Ep.2 "Mow Dads, Mow Problems"
In this weeks episode, our players find themselves trekking out for the first time into the world of Syndeo! They are tasked by the DMV with finding rule-breakers and resolving this issue. Sounds easy, but nothing is easy in Syndeo! How will they adapt to this new world? Only one way to find out...
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Main theme by, Elevate Audio
Find us on Instagram @questhappens
Quest Happens is: Corey Keller, Nick Jackson, Lauren Keller, and Nathan Guidry.
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Transcript
Welcome to Quest Happens.
A slapstick noob friendly actual play Dungeons and Dragons podcast where our players search for the meaning in their lives while suffering from never ending side quests. Will they ever find their own personal main quest? Or will they be cursed to wander the lands bouncing from quest to quest?
I guess you'll have to find out in Quest Happens. Previously on Quest Happens. The only door you see is behind the desks.
As if this wasn't confusing enough, each of you recognizes about a third of the room each. And that's when it clicks. You are responsible for the deaths of everyone in this room, whether intentionally or unintentionally. Welcome to Sindeo.
It's a world shaped like a donut. Negative. You are not in our system. We have an anomaly. Anomalies, please wait in the waiting area.
Lauren ("EZ"):A few minutes later, I kind of start a stampede within the town.
Nick (E'Louie):But as soon as Eloise sees her, he just gets this, this feeling of terror and he's like, oh my God. How did you get here?
Corey (DM):I didn't know we were gonna have three anomalies. I'm sure you have many questions, but let me quickly explain what has happened here. I'm sure you're really wondering what.
There was an error when this world was created and you were supposed to be reborn as a new person. But you are the same.
Lauren ("EZ"):I'm like hubba hubba.
Corey (DM):Wait, do you say that out loud?
Nathan ("Stump"):Oh, you know this man? Hello, Hubba Hu.
Nick (E'Louie):Do not.
Lauren ("EZ"):But I'd like to.
Corey (DM):This job that you all just did, and this one here, it wasn't actually supposed to go to anomalies. Someone down in the system flagged you. Specifically. I think someone might be watching you. And hello everyone.
Welcome to another exciting is episode of Quest Happens. I am Corey. I am your dm and I am here joined by Nick, Jackson and Nathan.
Nick (E'Louie):What do you mean? Ish. Exciting.
Corey (DM):On the Internet yet to be determined.
Lauren ("EZ"):Hello.
Nick (E'Louie):You guys supposed to say your name? Some people.
Lauren ("EZ"):Esmeralda.
Corey (DM):Hello, Esmeralda.
Lauren ("EZ"):Character names Lauren.
Corey (DM):Well, welcome everyone. We are so glad you decided to join us again for this episode two of Quest Happens. We really hope you enjoyed the last episode. I don't know. Do y'.
Nick (E'Louie):All.
Corey (DM):Did you all enjoy the making the last episode?
Nick (E'Louie):Oh, I did, yeah.
Nathan ("Stump"):It was a blast.
Nick (E'Louie):There was like air twerking and Easter.
Lauren ("EZ"):And Leaster Creeper, my future husband and.
Nick (E'Louie):You know, future ex husband, probably. Dang. Yeah. And. And eye dogs. What are they called? Ipups.
Nathan ("Stump"):Yeah, they're eye dogs too.
Lauren ("EZ"):My puppy.
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah, that was weird.
Corey (DM):Sounds like there was a lot packed into that last episode.
Lauren ("EZ"):It was fun, it was silly.
Corey (DM):Much like a Saturday morning cartoon. Well, we are back. We are ready to move forward with this adventure.
I'm super excited to see how you all actually adapt to this world that you all created. And I get to populate. So I'm actually excited to see now that we're actually venturing out into Sandeo, we're no longer in the dmv.
I think it's going to be a lot of fun. So where you all last left off, you completed your DMV First Tier 1 quest, which was able to get you your identities, allowed you to leave the dmv.
And he also got, you know, some, some compensation which two of you decided to spend on your gravity rings.
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah, and we got our stuff back. You did like our old school stuff.
Lauren ("EZ"):Yeah.
Corey (DM):The last realm, surprisingly that was populated in this world. When they redid it, that was one of the errors.
Nick (E'Louie):Great news for me.
Lauren ("EZ"):I didn't get a gravity ring though. I'm being frugal.
Nick (E'Louie):Saving that money just floating around.
Corey (DM):Well, that's awesome. So, yeah, you last left off, you completed the quest. Finch, who you met, who was kind of in charge of this DMV station set you along your way.
Sounded like he gave you a little bit of a warning there at the end.
Nathan ("Stump"):Yeah, that. Somebody's watching us.
Nick (E'Louie):Somebody's watching you.
Lauren ("EZ"):Who the heck?
Corey (DM):Who the heck? Yeah. So a little, little eerie. So we're going to start. You are now outside of the DMV you have left.
And as I kind of explained last episode, there's a lot going on out here. This beautiful jungle filled land that you are in, you're just seeing so many great, amazing things.
You do know that you have accepted another tier one quest. You're trying to raise funds so you can take the quick travel over to your new home.
Nathan ("Stump"):Yes, the tubes. Yes, the water tubes.
Nick (E'Louie):Instead of the four day walk or something like that.
Corey (DM):Exactly. Yeah. I mean, a walk probably would be good. You know, new world, gotta stretch those legs.
Lauren ("EZ"):A walk is free.
Nathan ("Stump"):True. I mean, you're not gonna be doing much walking.
Nick (E'Louie):Well, take a nice float.
Lauren ("EZ"):Well, I only float when it kicks. When the thing. I'm not floating all the time. Right.
Corey (DM):So like when I mentioned last time, outside in the world, gravity is wild. And unless you have a subscription to stay grounded, gravity will affect you. But the only other caveat is towns will pay for a.
Yes, citywide subscription. And outside, the DMV where you are at is currently under a bubble of pure gravity.
Nick (E'Louie):Oh, yeah.
Corey (DM):So you are still within the confines of the property of the dmv. So it is still under a gravity bubble, but depending on how far you go, it might start to kick in.
Nick (E'Louie):So easy's not floating yet?
Corey (DM):Not yet.
Nick (E'Louie):And when you get. That's what I thought. Nobody's gonna know you're broke because it's gonna be like talent subscription, but you may not pay your bills kind of thing.
Corey (DM):Yeah, exactly. And also, it just kind of looks like you're on a leash right now.
Lauren ("EZ"):Yeah, well, I'm a free thinker, so.
Nick (E'Louie):I'm a free thinker on a leash. That's being held by a giant goliath.
Lauren ("EZ"):Yes.
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah.
Corey (DM):So you're new to your one with it, your new Tier 1 quest. It is basically sending you on what I have. Yes. It was entitled Unauthorized lawn. The DMV classification is a civil infraction.
It is located here in the verdant sprawl, which is where you all are at. It says it's about a day's travel away from this DMV hub. On your request statistics, it does say threat level is low.
And it says your pay is a stipend, which is two, I believe we said two vouchers each. And then your reputation will go up. Now, there is the brief underneath the tier one adventure that does say description.
Reports of trimmed vegetation detected in the verdant sprawl. Investigation required. Do not mow and do not encourage mowing. Go. Basically take care of the issue and then report back.
Nick (E'Louie):We like it. We like it hairy.
Lauren ("EZ"):Is that what they say? Is that what we say?
Nick (E'Louie):Well, the lawn, I mean. Well, they like it. I guess we're just supposed to enforce. So unauthorized lawn. Someone's been cutting something.
Nathan ("Stump"):So we were also told that we were provided with a home. Right?
Corey (DM):Yes.
Nathan ("Stump"):Is that close?
Corey (DM):No, that's the four day travel that you all are.
Nathan ("Stump"):Yes, the four day travel. So the quest is one day away. Home is four days away.
Corey (DM):Correct.
Nathan ("Stump"):Is that correct? Yep. Gotcha. So we can't do that. We got to do the quest first.
Corey (DM):Absolutely. Yeah. Because your home is in Tumbill, in the Whiskerlands. The Whisker Lynn is a region over whisker.
Nathan ("Stump"):I like that.
Nick (E'Louie):Whiskerlands. Yeah.
Nathan ("Stump"):Well, I hope you wrote that down in my head. What happened is it's like the beginning of, like, Breath of the Wild. We just walked out and we've got this whole open world.
Corey (DM):Yes.
Nathan ("Stump"):And it's like, okay, which way do we go?
Lauren ("EZ"):Left.
Nathan ("Stump"):Dm. Roll for left.
Nick (E'Louie):Wait, I don't think that's.
Corey (DM):One is left.
Nick (E'Louie):No.
Corey (DM):On your. So, luckily, with these quests, it does typically tell you what part of the region to go to, and it does say that you do.
You are going to go northwest from where you are at, also known as north left. North left. Exactly. You're gonna go northwest from where you're at. About a day's journey.
And it does have, like, coordinates and these orbs that give you. Because these orbs, like, you don't see anything until you, like, put your eye up to it kind of situation.
But also they also have these, like, magical, like, tracking GPSs in a sense, where it does kind of guide you to where you need to go.
Nick (E'Louie):That's cool. Is it like a mini Palantir?
Corey (DM):Kind of. But you don't get this, like, see something else, and it doesn't take you.
Nick (E'Louie):Over or, like, damage your mind. Okay.
Corey (DM):No, you can see what you're. It's informational purposes only.
Nick (E'Louie):Gotcha.
Corey (DM):It's got its own little Tom Tom in it.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay.
Nathan ("Stump"):Oh, well, can we, like, I don't know, do, like, a quick rest before we head out?
Corey (DM):Oh, yeah.
Let's say, like, before you all left the dmv, we'll say you kind of, you know, before Fin sends you out, you took some time to rest, gather your things, suit up, you know, rest from your IDOG fight, and then you headed out, and that's when Finch was like, good luck. And, oh, also, by the way, something weird is going on. Someone might be watching you. I don't know what's happening. And then you're like, okay, cool.
Lauren ("EZ"):So we can acquire any other information, like, of who is watching us.
Corey (DM):We don't.
Nathan ("Stump"):Our characters don't know that. Well, I guess they do because he told you.
Corey (DM):Yeah, he said he doesn't know what's going on. It was just kind of weird. He just. He said he feels like maybe somebody might be watching you. He's kind of looking into it.
Nathan ("Stump"):I guess that's all he knows.
Corey (DM):Yeah.
Nathan ("Stump"):Someone's watching you.
Corey (DM):He's just a bureaucrat who notes, get updated, and then, you know, he follows orders.
Nathan ("Stump"):I was really tempted to kidnap Finch and take him with us.
Nick (E'Louie):I think he's just a creep. Nobody's watching. He's like, but someone's watching you. How does that make you feel?
Lauren ("EZ"):Important?
Nick (E'Louie):I don't think so. I think Finch is trustworthy.
Lauren ("EZ"):Yeah, it seems like it. So I get to put my armor, like.
Corey (DM):Yeah, you're suited up.
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah.
Corey (DM):Your character sheets are back to full.
Nick (E'Louie):He carries a bo staff and he has tied to his back an oak cask.
Lauren ("EZ"):What is a cask?
Nathan ("Stump"):It's like a big bottle, right?
Nick (E'Louie):It's like oak barrel. It's an oak barrel, but smaller.
Lauren ("EZ"):Oh, alcohol.
Nick (E'Louie):We don't know what's.
Corey (DM):So would a cask for you be like a mug for Stump?
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah.
Lauren ("EZ"):Yeah. A thimble.
Nick (E'Louie):Yes.
Lauren ("EZ"):Yeah.
Nathan ("Stump"):Well, I guess we should probably head out, right?
Lauren ("EZ"):Yeah, yeah.
Nick (E'Louie):So we're just what's on your person.
Corey (DM):Yeah. Do you want to. Yeah, he's got a good point. Do you want to.
Now that you have your stuff, do you want to give our audience a little bit of like, what are you carrying? What does it look like? Like, what do you. What are you suited with?
Lauren ("EZ"):So I have like my two main weapons. My main, main weapon is my great sword and it's almost as big as. And then I also carry a longbow. I'm mostly like an up front fighter.
Corey (DM):Interesting. You're carrying a longbow as well. That's like a long range weapon and a short range weapon.
Lauren ("EZ"):Yeah. So I'm prepared, you know, for.
Nick (E'Louie):Oh, you're a fighter. So.
Lauren ("EZ"):Yes, indeed. And then I have chainmail. So I'm clunky and loud and not too stealthy.
Corey (DM):Awesome.
Nick (E'Louie):And I got a war gong.
Corey (DM):So you never know when that's gonna come in handy.
Nick (E'Louie):Well, I mean, it's a war gong.
Lauren ("EZ"):Where are you hiding that?
Nick (E'Louie):Well, it's actually the. It's the top of the cask.
Corey (DM):Oh, nice.
Nick (E'Louie):It's kind of like clamps down on there.
Lauren ("EZ"):Okay.
Nick (E'Louie):And that way it kind of just like stays nice and tight.
Nathan ("Stump"):I've got a loincloth and an ax.
Corey (DM):Perfect. And rope and a leash in your hand.
Nathan ("Stump"):That's right.
Lauren ("EZ"):What's under that loincloth?
Nathan ("Stump"):Stump is a gentleman.
Lauren ("EZ"):He is. I asked that out of character. Esmerelda did not ask that.
Corey (DM):All right, so now our listeners have a little bit more of what to go with. With your character, which is nice. Okay, so you all going to go ahead and head out?
Lauren ("EZ"):Yes.
Nathan ("Stump"):Yeah, I think we should head northwest. Stump is like, oh, time to hit dusty trail.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay, hold on. Well, e takes a look at the little orb and verifies that that's where we need to go.
Corey (DM):It is.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay. And so he's like, all right, let's do it.
Nathan ("Stump"):Yes, Lead the way. Ilui Louis, don't follow.
Nick (E'Louie):So he starts walking.
Corey (DM):All right. And the complete opposite of a dusty trail as you are heading northwest and this lush grassy vines growing everywhere. You begin to walk.
It's pretty low grass in this area. But the trail trees that surround you have vines completely growing up them. I mean, when you think jungle, like this is jungle jungle, the.
Whenever you're looking at like the ground, the soil is actually kind of dark. It's like rich with nutrients and like, that's why everything here is just so lush. You know, the water, it doesn't really stay, go too deep.
It kind of like stays towards the top. If it, if the ground soaks it up, it stays towards the top, top there because, you know, water likes to try to make its way up.
So it's constantly like watering those roots and. And so as you're beginning your journey and heading there, you're, you know, going about 20ish minutes so far, just kind of checking things out.
You're seeing these magical, beautiful birds flying in the air. Some that are very multicolored, some you're like, oh, that's just a normal old pigeon. Yeah.
You know, and there just seems to be so many different types of birds. The clouds are the puffiest things you've ever seen. Almost very marshmallowy, you know, in texture. Like that's how like thick these clouds are.
But perfectly white. Like, no really any gradients to them. And you're seeing on the ground lots of smaller creatures going in and out of the grass.
More lizard like, you know, in this kind of climate here.
But one thing you do notice as you keep walking and walking and walking is the grass is getting higher and it is getting a little more unkept, unruly, unruly, you know, it is. Everything is just growing wild and free.
You do pass some spots where there's like moisture, but that moisture you see as you're walking, you start to see like little droplets go up past your eyeballs as it's just like heading into the sky. And you'll see a lot of the dew on the ground kind of doing the same thing. And then it gets to a certain point and just kind of falls back down.
But yeah, you're noticing that it's starting to get a little tall, especially for you. E and easy. Like you're about an hour into this trip and the grass is like, it's like up to your head.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay, are we on a path?
Corey (DM):You cannot see any actual, like visible paths at this point. Well, actually, why don't you go ahead and roll me a perception check.
Nick (E'Louie):Yep, here we go. Okay. Yep, that's a four stump.
Corey (DM):Since you're taller, why don't you roll me a perception check?
Lauren ("EZ"):That would make Sense.
Nathan ("Stump"):Absolutely. Up Dice.
Nick (E'Louie):This time he's like, there's a lot of grass.
Nathan ("Stump"):That's a nat one. Wow.
Corey (DM):Stump's just too worried looking at E. Wow. Easy. Why don't you go ahead and roll me a perception check?
Lauren ("EZ"):Well, if. Am I still on the ground? Turn. Okay. I was like, I might be able to see because I'm.
Corey (DM):We'll say like, it's get. It's getting there. You can still see above it.
Lauren ("EZ"):I rolled. I rolled a four.
Nick (E'Louie):Blind lead.
Corey (DM):Okay. Is blind leading the blind ear.
Lauren ("EZ"):So I have a plus one. Does it?
Corey (DM):Oh, no, it is not. So.
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah.
Corey (DM):The grass is getting really high. You're getting further away from them. Dmv. Easy. You're starting to feel a little light.
Lauren ("EZ"):Uneasy.
Corey (DM):Easy. Starting to feel a little uneasy.
Like, your steps, your strides are starting to be like, a little longer because they're like, with each step you take, it's almost like a little skip to your step.
Lauren ("EZ"):I'm having a good time.
Corey (DM):Yep.
Nick (E'Louie):He's almost moonwalking. Almost, huh?
Lauren ("EZ"):Yeah. What's it. What's it smell like here?
Corey (DM):Oh, it just smells like that fresh rain in the mornings, you know, and it's just so pleasing to the nostrils.
Lauren ("EZ"):I'm really enjoying this, guys. Like, this is already better than the walk. Yeah.
Corey (DM):Just.
Lauren ("EZ"):This is already better than my past life. I'm really looking forward to this journey.
Nathan ("Stump"):Stump gets in front and he's like, stump cut new path and starts swinging his ax, cutting the grass as we go.
Nick (E'Louie):I don't.
Corey (DM):You knew that.
Nathan ("Stump"):Yes. We're supposed to know that mowing is outlawed. He's just like, your stump stronger than this grass.
Corey (DM):I will remind you, your quest literally said vegetation is protected by law and not to cut.
Lauren ("EZ"):And then I'm like, hey, buddy, I don't think we're supposed to do that.
Nathan ("Stump"):And as that happens, X ray screen pulls in front of Stump and you see, like, a little peanut in his brain. And then he goes, yeah, Stump.
Nick (E'Louie):No.
Nathan ("Stump"):And he keeps cutting grass.
Corey (DM):Okay. As of now, like, nothing really happens while you're doing that.
Nathan ("Stump"):Okay.
Corey (DM):Okay.
Nick (E'Louie):But maybe we could see a little bit better.
Corey (DM):Yeah. Also, based on what you rolled, I'm not going to really give you anything.
Nathan ("Stump"):Yeah.
Corey (DM):From. Based off of what you're cutting, like, your perception, your. What you're noticing is far beyond you at the moment.
There could be something happening.
Nathan ("Stump"):Yeah.
Corey (DM):You all just don't know at the moment.
Nathan ("Stump"):Yeah. It's all good.
Corey (DM):Yep. So as you're, like, going through and cutting and cutting, eventually you go dunk.
Nathan ("Stump"):Oh, Stump hit something and you.
Corey (DM):You reach over to look and you kind of clear some of the. The tall grass. And the. You two are just like down below looking up at Stump and just surrounded by tall grass, a stump.
When you hit it and you kind of move the grass, you see a wooden, like, bridge.
Nick (E'Louie):Oh, it's.
Corey (DM):It's almost just like elevated planks. And so when you kind of look at it, you notice that it actually makes a path through this grass.
Nathan ("Stump"):Oh, Stump.
Corey (DM):Fire elevated.
Lauren ("EZ"):Good job, buddy.
Nick (E'Louie):Well done, lad.
Nathan ("Stump"):Just another Tuesday for Stump.
Nick (E'Louie):So he comes over to check it out and gets on top of the wood to. Because it's elevated, you said?
Corey (DM):Yeah. So you have to like, climb up it. It's like on pillars.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay.
Corey (DM):But it's about up to like, Stump's head is like where.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay.
Corey (DM):The bottom of it is, but there like pillars, you know?
Nathan ("Stump"):Do you need a boost?
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah. So he says, little friend. Of course. Give me a leg.
Nathan ("Stump"):Here you go. And Stump puts his hand out and.
Nick (E'Louie):He steps on it.
Nathan ("Stump"):Yeah. And Stump gives him a little boost.
Nick (E'Louie):Nice little jump up on top of the platform. Cool. Yeah.
Corey (DM):As you are. The rest of you kind of following up on the platform.
Nathan ("Stump"):Of course, Stump also gives Fitz monster a boost.
Lauren ("EZ"):Okay.
Nathan ("Stump"):Well, it was really easy. Oh, did you lose weight?
Lauren ("EZ"):Thank you for noticing.
Nick (E'Louie):Wow.
Nathan ("Stump"):It's like you wait like absolutely nothing now.
Lauren ("EZ"):Oh, goodness.
Nathan ("Stump"):We must be getting.
Lauren ("EZ"):Okay, good.
Nathan ("Stump"):Less gravity. Ish.
Corey (DM):Now he's smart. No.
Nick (E'Louie):Yes.
Corey (DM):You all make your way up to the top of this bridge. And as you get up there, you notice for the first time that there's no paths. Like our typical paths.
When you see like in the woods or something that's kind of like continuously been walked on or cut away.
Nick (E'Louie):Except for what Stump?
Corey (DM):Except for what Stump just did.
Nick (E'Louie):Some people.
Corey (DM):So you're on this path and you look and you see there is just so many, like, splits and.
And just like trails of these little bridges, these platforms that are built above the grass so that way you're not disturbing it and you can actually walk for these are. These are like your roads.
Lauren ("EZ"):Do we see other people or anything while we're up there?
Corey (DM):Not at the moment, no. I mean, you see, like, when you look back towards like the DMV area, we've gone a good way. That it's like way in the distance now.
But you do see some coming and going, like back that way. But you're now heading outside of the, like, commercial zone.
Nick (E'Louie):So he consults the orb to see which direction we need to go.
Corey (DM):And as you're like, looking at which way to go. You're standing for looking forward kind of in the same direction. You're going just maybe askew just a little bit.
And it's telling you basically in that general direction, but you can't go straight in the general direction.
So you're kind of, like, mapping in your brain as you see all the different twists and turns and branching offs of these little platform bridges that have been built for people to walk over the vegetation.
Nick (E'Louie):Cool.
Corey (DM):So planning it out. Yeah.
Nick (E'Louie):It's not, like, straight on. Okay. So he says, I think it's this way.
Nathan ("Stump"):Okay.
Lauren ("EZ"):Okay.
Nick (E'Louie):Start hopping along.
Corey (DM):Easy enough, right?
Nathan ("Stump"):Good to stop.
Lauren ("EZ"):Okay. So now that we can kind of see a little bit more, I was tempted to get, like, on stump shoulders. I may still do it, so. Okay.
I'm just gonna climb you like a. Like a tree stump?
Corey (DM):Yeah.
You notice that, like, when you're, like, climbing a stump, you, you know, you put your arms on and you, like, go to, like, lift yourself up and you go to put your foot somewhere. But you realize when you, like, pull yourself up, like, it's like, nothing. You're kind of, like, going up and down, like. Okay.
Like, because you're becoming so much more weightless at this point. You can just, like, grab and, like, just use your arms to go up if you wanted to.
Lauren ("EZ"):This is the best day of my life to know I'm having a good old time.
Corey (DM):Yeah.
Nick (E'Louie):But you. You.
Corey (DM):You are noticing that the gravity is shifting here. So there's a lot less gravity. But you two have fully charged rings on your fingers that, if you remember how long they lasted.
Nick (E'Louie):Oh, 24 hours. No, weeks. A week. Well, and I got to. I got to watch it to see if it stops glowing.
Corey (DM):They last for a week, and then you have to recharge them.
Nick (E'Louie):Yep.
Corey (DM):Okay. If you want to keep the gravity.
Nick (E'Louie):Gotcha. Yeah.
Lauren ("EZ"):Yeah.
Corey (DM):I mean, you may find better deals somewhere else. You never know. But that's what the deal.
Nick (E'Louie):Gravity shopping especially. Easy.
Corey (DM):Perfect.
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah.
Corey (DM):You're making your way, you know. You know, you know, you have to go about a day's travel, we'll say about another three hours goes by. At this point, you're like.
It is kind of strange. You haven't really seen anybody else traveling these. But eventually you do see another group of.
It looks about two dwarves and a dragonborn creature are making their way into your direction, like, heading in the direction of where the DMV was. So you see another group that's, like, making their way back. That's about the only thing we've seen, hello, hi, friends.
And they're, like, at that awkward distance ahead of you, you know, whereas. So they're just like. You just see them, like, waving like, hi.
Nathan ("Stump"):I stop, don't want to talk.
Lauren ("EZ"):And then I wave as well.
Corey (DM):Eventually, you know, about another 10 minutes goes by before you finally get in the contact. And the whole 10 minutes, he just.
Nick (E'Louie):Kind of looks back at him and kind of smiles a little bit and just kind of shakes his head a little.
Lauren ("EZ"):I wave the whole 10 minutes.
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah, perfect.
Nathan ("Stump"):Stump was yelling the whole time. And as we get closer, he's still like, hi.
Corey (DM):Yeah. So eventually you get there and there's. Yes, a dragonborn who's got, like, the golden scales. And you see two dwarven men with him.
And, you know, they got their axes and they got some, like, adventuring packs. And, like, they're. They're pretty. Looks like they're pretty equipped to do some things. And they're making their way and you just hear, oh, hello.
How's it going? How's it traveling?
Lauren ("EZ"):I wonder if you guys.
Nick (E'Louie):Top of the morning to you.
Corey (DM):Oh, top of the. Well, it's more midday.
Nick (E'Louie):Oh, of course it is. Yes, you're right. Where are y' all coming come from? Where do you go?
Corey (DM):Well, we came from my friend, Cotton Eye Joe.
Nathan ("Stump"):Is that his name?
Lauren ("EZ"):I knew you.
Corey (DM):It is now. Well, my name's Cotton Eye Joe. We just got done completing a Tier 3 quest, and we're just going in to turn it in.
Nick (E'Louie):Wow. Wow, that's fantastic.
Nathan ("Stump"):Tier three.
Lauren ("EZ"):I'm Jelly.
Nick (E'Louie):Goodness, what did you have to do?
Corey (DM):Well, there was a. A village back on the inner rim. It was being attacked by some. Well, some nasty little creatures.
So we had to take them out and got that done, taken care of. Was much easier than we thought. Now just, you know, go and get our six vouchers each.
Nick (E'Louie):Wow. Fantastic. Sounds like you've got a good job, then.
Corey (DM):Oh, yeah. We kind of make this our career. And you hear the other guy next to him. Yeah, it's been going pretty well. We've been really enjoying it.
We got some good money going on. We decided to just keep the party rolling. And this is our new job.
Lauren ("EZ"):Wow. I don't know what to say.
Nathan ("Stump"):That's pretty cool.
Nick (E'Louie):He thinks the guy's voice sounds funny, but he's just, you know, being congenial.
Corey (DM):Yeah.
Nick (E'Louie):And he says, well, best. Best of luck to you. Yeah, we're off to do our first one, and we just get one voucher for it.
Corey (DM):Oh, well, you Must be some newbies. Okay, well, it's. They start off pretty simple. It's a little bit of a grind.
But once you can kind of get in the rhythm of it and turn in enough quests, they might hire you full time, just take care of their quest for them and make a good living.
Lauren ("EZ"):I hope so. And I think we're getting two vouchers. Is that what our.
Corey (DM):Oh, two for a tier one.
Nick (E'Louie):One voucher.
Corey (DM):Two.
Nick (E'Louie):One something. Two vouchers.
Corey (DM):Technically. I mean, technically, you are getting two vouchers each for this next one. But I don't know if you're just, like, trying not to tell them that or. Okay.
Nick (E'Louie):No. E's just old and forgot. Okay.
Corey (DM):Oh, well, that's pretty good for tier one. So it must. Must be a little bit higher on the tier one scale, but I think y' all should be able to handle it.
Nick (E'Louie):Just keep it up.
Corey (DM):You might be like us one day and, you know, make a good living out of this. What. What parts y' all living at?
Nathan ("Stump"):We are living somewhere in Tumbill.
Nick (E'Louie):What my friend. What my friend means to say is that, yes, we're from Tum. We have a home in Tumbill, but we have to get there first.
Corey (DM):Oh, she haven't actually been to your. Oh, she must be new. New. Like, they just. You assigned you a place?
Nick (E'Louie):That's correct, yes.
Corey (DM):Well, I mean, if any place to live, that's a. That's getting the other guy's like, yeah, if you live out there in Tonville, like, you're gonna be pretty. Pretty set for life. Like, it's.
It's pretty bougie out there.
Nathan ("Stump"):Oh, good to know. Good to know.
Nick (E'Louie):Oh, wow.
Corey (DM):Yeah. Have you never been there before?
Lauren ("EZ"):Huh?
Corey (DM):You never been there before?
Nick (E'Louie):No.
Lauren ("EZ"):No.
Corey (DM):Oh, man. Well, shoot, I'll give anything live there, but, I mean, I ain't used to washing my hands all the time before I eat and stuff.
But that's bougie over there.
Lauren ("EZ"):Well, you should come visit us. I would like to get to know you. What's your. What's your name?
Corey (DM):My name. My name is Timothy.
Lauren ("EZ"):Oh, okay. I thought it was maybe Boomhauer.
Corey (DM):No, my name's Timothy. Oh, okay. Yeah, my brother here. Cotton Eye Joe.
Lauren ("EZ"):Yes.
Corey (DM):And Frankfurt up here. He doesn't talk much.
Lauren ("EZ"):Okay. Do you like hot dogs?
Nathan ("Stump"):Is Frankfurt the Dragonborn? Gotcha.
Corey (DM):And the Dragonborn just nods, but he doesn't, like, say anything. He just nods.
Lauren ("EZ"):Okay. At the hot dog comment.
Corey (DM):No, he was asking about the. He's a Dragonborn.
Lauren ("EZ"):Okay.
Corey (DM):Yeah.
Nick (E'Louie):Well, pleased to meet. Yeah, I guess we'll be on our way in now.
Corey (DM):That sounds good. Just be careful out there. And remember, just turn them in on time, get your reputation up, and you can be making the good vouchers.
Nick (E'Louie):So that's the second time he said reputation.
Lauren ("EZ"):Oh, wow. Thank you for the insight. And I hope we come across you guys again.
Corey (DM):Oh, I'm sure you'll be seeing plenty of us. Well, if you're out in the Whiskerlands, I don't know if we'll be seeing you much, but we may cross paths one of these days.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay.
Nathan ("Stump"):Yes. And direction you're going, Stump make great path. So you'll be good once you get to the grass. That's too tall. Stump fix.
Corey (DM):What do you mean?
Nathan ("Stump"):Oh, Stump here. Stump didn't know you don't understand things. Well, Stump take axe and he make grass better.
Nick (E'Louie):We ought to be getting on the way.
Corey (DM):The minute, like you say that, he just. His eyes get a little like kind of big.
Nathan ("Stump"):Oh, you got gas. This happened to Stump. Stump understands.
Corey (DM):He actually. They just kind of stopped talking and him and his brother look at each other and then the. The Dragonborn looks down.
They all kind of nod, and then they just keep walking. Oh, well, don't even say bye.
Nathan ("Stump"):Okay, well, thanks. You're welcome.
Lauren ("EZ"):Hey, everybody.
Nick (E'Louie):Strange. I don't. I don't think you need to be cutting the grass, Stump. I think that. I don't think they like this.
Nathan ("Stump"):Why not?
Lauren ("EZ"):I think that's grass.
Nathan ("Stump"):I can't even talk.
Lauren ("EZ"):I think it's a rule. And if we do do it, maybe.
Nathan ("Stump"):Stupid rule. Who would come up with a rule that stupid?
Lauren ("EZ"):That's a very good question.
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah, well, the ways here are different, lad. They're not very happy when we cut the grass, it seems.
Nathan ("Stump"):Oh, he seemed like he just had a bad dinner.
Nick (E'Louie):I don't think it was dinner.
Lauren ("EZ"):And I don't think it was gas.
Nathan ("Stump"):Listen, Stomp, cut at least 100 grass and we are fine.
Lauren ("EZ"):Let's maybe keep it to a minimum.
Nick (E'Louie):We're going on the way here and the way of the land. In this place, you can't cut the grass. We need to be very mindful.
Nathan ("Stump"):Oh, okay. Just for you guys. Because Stump like you guys, Stump will cut less grass when you are around.
Lauren ("EZ"):And if we do cut grass, maybe we shouldn't tell anybody about it. Let's keep it on.
Nathan ("Stump"):Okay, Stump do everything then.
Nick (E'Louie):Oh, my gosh. Do everything. That's.
Lauren ("EZ"):I. I just don't want to get in trouble. My. This has got to Be a better life for me.
Corey (DM):So, Stump, roll me a perception check.
Nathan ("Stump"):Okay. That's a three.
Nick (E'Louie):Wow.
Corey (DM):Oh, my gosh.
Nathan ("Stump"):Okay, so last session was, like, all 20s, and now.
Corey (DM):Yep.
Nathan ("Stump"):We're getting.
Lauren ("EZ"):Not anything above balances here.
Corey (DM):Eloise, why don't you roll me a perception check?
Nathan ("Stump"):Thank you. Please. 14.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay. 16. Yep. Plus two. 16. I have 14 plus two.
Lauren ("EZ"):Okay.
Corey (DM):As you all are kind of, like, staring at the group that is walking back to the dmv, Stump is, you know, shouting by and whatever, and. Yeah, Eloise, something catches your attention. Stump, what'd you say your weapon was again?
Nathan ("Stump"):It's an ax.
Corey (DM):It's an axe. Great ax. You notice, you know, he has his great ax strewn on his back.
And as you're kind of, like, waving, since you're kind of, like, lower to the ground and closer to where, like, the axe head is, like, hanging down, you notice, like, there's still some, like, shards or some, like, blades of grass that are still attached to, like, his. Oh, yeah, his ax.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay.
Corey (DM):And you. You notice that, like, his ax begins to kind of shake almost just like there's like, some small vibrations. And you notice, like, the.
The blades of grass aren't just sitting there on the ax hanging on, you know, is it just, like leftovers from cutting, like, they begin to, like, dance around and shake, but violently on the axe head. And it's. It's almost like they're the ones that are causing the axe head to. Or the axe to, like, shake, and then it just kind of stops.
That's all you see.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay, so he says, stomp. There's something strange going on. The grass on your axe. What? The grass on your axe.
Nathan ("Stump"):Oh, stomp. Sorry. And he, like, kind of embarrassingly, is, like, brushing his.
Nick (E'Louie):His butt. No, no, not your arse.
Nathan ("Stump"):What's on my ass? Your axe. What, Stump's ass?
Nick (E'Louie):Not your arse? No, the grass there. It's moving. Oh.
Nathan ("Stump"):Stump takes his.
Nick (E'Louie):There's something.
Nathan ("Stump"):She's like, what? Oh, yeah, there's some grass. And he kind of blows on it. It's no big deal. You guys are so weird about grass.
Corey (DM):And when you blow the grass, it doesn't just, like, blow and fall to the ground.
It blows and kind of gets carried up and then swirls around a little bit and just keeps getting continued off in towards the direction that you're walking, and it kind of just keeps floating that way.
Nathan ("Stump"):Oh, so beautiful.
Nick (E'Louie):It's gonna tell the plants. It's gonna tell other plants. Something somewhere is going down.
Lauren ("EZ"):We really have to be careful.
Nathan ("Stump"):Twist. The plot is just the happening.
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah, the happening, yeah. Marky Mark shows up, so he's like, well, we better get going. It's gonna be dark soon. Let's get the move on it. Cut.
Nathan ("Stump"):Come.
Corey (DM):Come on.
Nathan ("Stump"):Esmerelta.
Lauren ("EZ"):Okay. And I'm like, kind of pats you.
Nathan ("Stump"):On the head because you're on his shoulder still, right?
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah.
Nathan ("Stump"):And he pats up there. He's like, let's go. Puts his ax up.
Lauren ("EZ"):So the grass is following us?
Corey (DM):No, no, it's, like, way ahead of you.
Nathan ("Stump"):Oh, it's going the way we're going, though.
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah.
Lauren ("EZ"):Oh, so it's showing us the way.
Nathan ("Stump"):I don't know about that.
Corey (DM):I don't know.
Lauren ("EZ"):Or it's going to the authorities.
Corey (DM):Well, as far as you know, the authorities are behind you.
Nathan ("Stump"):There's, like, a blade of grass and a, like, glee department, like, crying and filling out a report.
Lauren ("EZ"):Murdered my family.
Corey (DM):So, yeah. As you begin to continue your journey, you know, e. You're looking into the orb to make sure you're still heading in the right track.
You're noticing that, like, the. The little, like, X points of where it's telling you to go to in. The orb is getting brighter.
So you're like, okay, maybe that means we're getting closer, you know? And, I mean, you've gone about. We'll say we're now about three quarters of the day, you know, of this journey.
You feel like you're getting a lot closer. It's like, okay, you know, night begins to fall. You haven't really passed a whole lot other people.
Occasionally you would see some, like, birds flying by, but that was, like, the only actual group of people that you saw this whole time so far on this journey. And now night begins to fall. You're still on the bridge.
Lauren ("EZ"):You.
Corey (DM):All you really see is just the beauty of the stars. Like, it is so bright, so beautiful. You see these, like, green, wavy lines in the sky.
You see the clouds are still there, but not as bright at night, but, like, they're still up in the sky. It's just a beautiful night. The temperature is perfect here in the verdant greens. And, yeah, night. Night has fallen.
Are you going to continue your journey, or do you feel like you should probably make some camp?
Nathan ("Stump"):Oh, we could. We could camp out on this bridge.
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah. He says, yeah, I don't know the place here. We don't know. The grass moves funny, and people don't like that. Maybe we ought to pitch a tent, maybe.
Nathan ("Stump"):Sure.
Lauren ("EZ"):This is. I. This is. I don't know what could. What bad could happen here? It's just all so beautiful. Like. Yeah, it is a little funky, but it is really beautiful.
Nick (E'Louie):So E would like to roll an insight. And, you know, he's a monk, right? And so he's just trying to, like, always be one with the universe kind of thing.
Corey (DM):Right.
Nick (E'Louie):Very monkish. And so he just wants to do, like, an insight. I like that. Can I do that?
Nathan ("Stump"):It's like you're looking at the stars and kind of having a. I'm trying to discern.
Lauren ("EZ"):Having a moment.
Nick (E'Louie):I'm having a moment, and I've got. You know, he's stroking his beard, like, you know, just. He pulls it all the way out like this and just lets it go.
And he's just trying to discern whether this is a hostile environment or a peaceful environment.
Corey (DM):Mm. Yeah. Go ahead and roll me an insight. Check. I like that.
Nick (E'Louie):8. And to just a 10.
Corey (DM):10. Okay with that 10. As you try to commune with the universe, you know, you. What is it, like, a form of, like, meditation that you would say he does?
Nick (E'Louie):He sits down. He's wearing, like, this. You know, he's got, like, a monk robe on or, like a ghee kind of thing with a blue belt.
Corey (DM):Yeah.
Nick (E'Louie):And he just kind of sits down, and he's got a big smile on his face, and he closes his eyes, and he just. Again, he's just like, thing with the. He, like, grabs his beard and he runs it through his fingers all the way out.
Corey (DM):Nice. So they kind of do that over and over again.
While you're in meditative, the other two of you are just watching as E is just kind of by himself doing this.
Nick (E'Louie):And occasionally he makes a noise, like.
Corey (DM):Perfect. So as you. As you continue to do this, E. And you're like. It's almost like a little bit of an ascension happens when you do this. And it.
As your memories are starting to come back a little bit, you know, you all still don't remember much, but you. You are now remembering, like, when you used to do this in your past life and just how peaceful this was.
And in this world, while you're communing and doing that, you're. You're starting to feel kind of like a Ying and a Yang situation.
Like, you were just feeling some of the most peace you have ever felt, but at the same time, you feel like some chaos is trying to just, like, break through that. So you're going through, like, these waves that have, like. It's like peace and quiet chaos. Peace and quiet chaos.
Like, so they're just continuously pulling against each other, and you can't settle it.
Lauren ("EZ"):Oh, boy.
Nick (E'Louie):So e. Kind of. Well, I'm not sure about this place. I'm not feeling much. Like there's much danger, but I don't know.
Would you all like to continue, or should we maybe pitch a tent?
Nathan ("Stump"):Stump is, like, breaking off a chunk of the bridge. Like, oh, my gosh. And, like, trying to make a campfire.
Like, he has, like, a piece of bridge and another piece of bridge, and he's just rubbing them together. He's like, all right, let's everybody get comfy.
Nick (E'Louie):Wow.
Lauren ("EZ"):Oh, goodness.
Nathan ("Stump"):It's not working at all.
Corey (DM):No, not at all.
Nathan ("Stump"):There's no fire happening. Happening here. But he's. He's very confident.
Nick (E'Louie):He walks over, and just as Stump's kneeling over, trying to do this wood thing, he just kind of puts a hand on his shoulder and just pats it, you know, just like, good try, buddy. And. And you're welcome. And he says, yeah, maybe we'll find a place here in the grass. We can just lay down.
Nathan ("Stump"):Yeah. I think Stump ends up, like, just laying down on the bridge with the chunks of wood and bridge just, like, over him like an awful blanket.
That's where he ends up.
Corey (DM):He kind of just gave up and just.
Nathan ("Stump"):Yeah, he got tired and fell asleep.
Nick (E'Louie):You know, and he is gonna kind of stand guard. I'm gonna stand guard for four hours.
Corey (DM):Okay.
Lauren ("EZ"):I'm gonna lay in the grass and look up.
Nathan ("Stump"):We tie you to something.
Corey (DM):Yeah.
Lauren ("EZ"):To the bridge, maybe.
Nathan ("Stump"):Yeah.
Lauren ("EZ"):So. But I'm gonna go lay in the grass and I'm gonna look up and just kind of observe for a moment before drifting off.
Corey (DM):And you're, like, literally, you're getting so close to the edge of the gravity bubble, to where you're still, like, half in, half out kind of situation because it, like, tapers, you know? So, like, you. You'll float up, hit the end of the rope, and come back down slowly into the grass for a few minutes and then right back.
Lauren ("EZ"):Yeah. What a life. Okay.
Nick (E'Louie):And easy happens to float over Stump snoring.
Corey (DM):And then it's just.
Nathan ("Stump"):Yeah, that's a great visual.
Corey (DM):Yeah, that's awesome. So as you all are sleeping, this is some of the most peaceful you have felt since you've been here.
In your whole 24 hours of existence in this new world, this has been the most peaceful you have felt. As you're sleeping under the stars of Sandeo shooting across the sky.
You're seeing the auroras in the sky, just beautiful, reflecting, just Nature in all its glory. You hear sounds of bugs just making a beautiful harmonies and songs in the grass and in the trees. The birds singing. Easy.
Why don't you roll me a perception check?
Lauren ("EZ"):Getting nervous? Oh man, I. I need to roll a ditch. So it is a six.
Corey (DM):Six. All right, last chance for Stump. I just want to give you a nighttime check.
Nathan ("Stump"):So here we go. Gonna roll a new character after this.
Lauren ("EZ"):Roll above 10.
Nick (E'Louie):Hey, that's not too bad.
Nathan ("Stump"):14.
Corey (DM):Okay.
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah, zero on it.
Nathan ("Stump"):I do have a plus two. I. I didn't mention it earlier, but Yeah, I got plus two.
Corey (DM):All right, perfect. So 16.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay.
Corey (DM):Awesome. Yeah. So everyone else is kind of e. You've kind of hit the end of your four hours and now you kind of drift into a peaceful sleep.
You're like, okay, nothing's really going on. It is so peaceful and quiet out here. Easy is completely just floating up and down, up and down.
Stump, you're kind of starting to stir a little bit in your sleep.
You turn to kind of get a little more comfortable and just for like a split second, somewhere in the distance and not in just one direction, but in a few different directions.
As it is now getting darker in the night, you're seeing that like the, the auroras are going from this beautiful green to almost this red tint and then back to green.
Nathan ("Stump"):Yeah.
Corey (DM):And you start to hear these squawks of. It almost sounds like birds being murdered in the sky. And these like hot.
These low guttural and high pitched squawks coming and they almost sound like kind of closer. No, they're not getting closer. They're in the distance. Like there's nowhere near you. But you do hear this and it's kind of unsettling.
In the distance you just start to hear this like almost babble cries as well of some like birds in the distance. And then the auroras turn back to a green beautiful color. And then the squawking stops and you kind of are just like, that was weird.
Nathan ("Stump"):You know, Stump kind of gets up and he looks over, he sees where elui is and he like, are you on the bridge or are you down in the.
Nick (E'Louie):No, I'm in the grass.
Nathan ("Stump"):Okay. Stump slowly climbs down into the grass and like goes over near Elui and like sits down and is kind of like, okay, Stump, sleep here.
Lauren ("EZ"):Oh, you're scared, big fella.
Nathan ("Stump"):He's a little freaked out by that sky just turned blood red. And he heard like horrible guttural squawks and he's just kind of like okay, stop.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay.
Nathan ("Stump"):Slip sleep over here.
Corey (DM):Yep.
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah.
Corey (DM):So you make your way over there and then eventually you all drift back to sleep. Well, you two are still asleep, but st. You eventually drift back to sleep as the night begins to fall again.
Nick (E'Louie):All right.
Corey (DM):As the night goes on and you have slept one of the most beautiful sleeps you've had in. Well, since you can remember. Except Stump had a little bit of that scary moment in the middle of a bad time. Exactly.
Lauren ("EZ"):Night terror.
Nick (E'Louie):You.
Corey (DM):You arise. It is morning time. You hear birds singing beautifully in the air. Brightly colored long tails, big feathers.
You see creatures back again, rumbling across. You see the morning dew begin to rise.
It actually feels refreshing as it kind of like goes up over you, you know, and then it gets to a certain point and then it kind of falls back down. Are we going to continue our journey now that you have woken up?
Lauren ("EZ"):I feel so refreshed and just. I have arrived. I feel like. So I'm gonna just.
Nick (E'Louie):Oh, yeah, keep going. I think e is just spry, you know, he's like, all right, let's get going.
Lauren ("EZ"):And how does Stump look?
Nathan ("Stump"):Stump is kind of like. He looks a little drowsy and he's kind of like, oh, time to sun's up. Stump up to.
Corey (DM):So he says.
Nick (E'Louie):All right, are we ready to go? Let's move on. We've got a beautiful day ahead of us.
Lauren ("EZ"):It's gonna be great.
Nick (E'Louie):Cheers.
Lauren ("EZ"):Chee said.
Nick (E'Louie):Stump, Are. Are you all right?
Nathan ("Stump"):Yeah, Stump fine. But you. You guys saw last night. This guy.
Lauren ("EZ"):This guy is beautiful.
Nathan ("Stump"):Well, mostly. But you saw how sky was like all red and.
Corey (DM):Oh, no.
Nathan ("Stump"):Angry, right?
Lauren ("EZ"):What's that?
Nick (E'Louie):The last time I saw, it was green and beautiful and calm. Did you see something stomp? What happened?
Nathan ("Stump"):Well, it's probably nothing, but you know, Stump heard weird noises and sky turns red and it's fine. Stump okay.
Nick (E'Louie):Aw, sounds like you had a bad dream, lad.
Nathan ("Stump"):Yes.
Corey (DM):Feel free to wake me up.
Nathan ("Stump"):Don't just have bad dream. That must be.
Lauren ("EZ"):I pat you on the shin. Like just.
Nathan ("Stump"):Oh, yeah.
Lauren ("EZ"):It's okay, buddy.
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah. Stomping.
Nathan ("Stump"):Of course. Okay, Stump.
Corey (DM):Okay.
Nathan ("Stump"):Are you okay?
Lauren ("EZ"):I'm great.
Nathan ("Stump"):Okay. Everyone's okay.
Lauren ("EZ"):Everyone, are you okay?
Nick (E'Louie):It looks like Stump is a little big.
Nathan ("Stump"):A big, big on happy Stump big and okay. Big okay for Stump.
Nick (E'Louie):Well, let's get going. It's a great day. Yes.
Nathan ("Stump"):Time to hit the old wet and damp trail.
Corey (DM):Yes, it is. Are you all gonna get back on the wooden paths?
Nick (E'Louie):Wooden path?
Nathan ("Stump"):Yeah, I like. I like that.
Corey (DM):Absolutely. And you've noticed too, like as you travel on these, you know, makeshift bridges, the grass varies in size depending on where it's growing.
Sometimes there's, you know, rocks and other things around, so sometimes the grass is shorter and then sometimes way tall. And it just, you know, varies. Yeah. You continue your journey, e. You begin to look into the sphere to see how close you are.
And it's like saying, like, okay, you're getting much close. And you remember, like, okay, we're supposed to be looking for unauthorized, you know, cutting of grass and authorized lawn.
So you're kind of keeping your eye for that.
And eventually, up ahead, just to the right of the bridge you're walking on, so, like, in the distance of where all the grass is, where there's really no bridges over there, you notice that you see almost a small path that's been cleared through the grass that leads into a large clearing. You can't quite make out how large this clearing is because you're just barely seeing over in the distance.
But you notice that, like, there is a lot of tall grass, and there's just a huge circle where there's no grass.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay.
Corey (DM):And your thing is now being, like. As you're looking into it and pointing in that direction now. Yeah, and there's definitely some kind of clearing there. And you do notice that there.
Someone has walked through this grass, because you can see where the grass has kind of been pushed and people have walked through.
Nick (E'Louie):I think we've arrived. The orb is going off, and it looks like someone's been cutting the grass there.
Lauren ("EZ"):Was it. Was it stump?
Nathan ("Stump"):No stump. Cut grass earlier.
Lauren ("EZ"):Oh, okay.
Nathan ("Stump"):So the unauthorized lawn is this?
Nick (E'Louie):I. I believe so, yeah.
Lauren ("EZ"):Somebody cut the grass when they weren't supposed to.
Nathan ("Stump"):Oh, well, what a fool. Shouldn't have done that.
Nick (E'Louie):That's great, Stone.
Nathan ("Stump"):Well, let's go. I'll cut the way over to the cliff.
Nick (E'Louie):Well, wait, wait. Just tell me.
Corey (DM):Yes, yes, yes.
Nick (E'Louie):Now, don't. Don't cut the grass. That's what we're here to do, to find the people who did. So maybe we can all have a look around.
Nathan ("Stump"):Oh, stop. No.
Nick (E'Louie):And don't throw.
Nathan ("Stump"):Both of you now over to the clearing.
Lauren ("EZ"):Okay.
Nick (E'Louie):Well, I don't hate the idea.
Lauren ("EZ"):Fitz.
Nathan ("Stump"):Monster knows how to do things efficiently.
Lauren ("EZ"):Yeah.
Nick (E'Louie):Before we do that, let's look back in this ball and see exactly what we're supposed to do here. Okay, dad, is there any information at all of, like, are we trying to, like, murder the people who were doing this? Are we just arresting them?
Are we going to tell them? No, no, no.
Corey (DM):There are notes under it that say, and it's signed by Finch. And it says, this should be simple. Walk out, look at the grass. Right. Don't do it again. You know, basically give a ticket. Don't cut any more grass.
And if it takes more than a day, something should be wrong.
Lauren ("EZ"):Can I slap them on the wrist?
Nathan ("Stump"):Wait, wait, wait. Do we see. We don't see anybody.
Corey (DM):It's too far away to know if anyone's over there.
Nathan ("Stump"):We don't see anybody.
Nick (E'Louie):All right, so onward.
Lauren ("EZ"):Yeah, I want to slap them on the wrist.
Nick (E'Louie):Missed. Well, you can slap them when you see them or maybe don't. Okay. So he says, well, let's get going.
Maybe there's someone there, but we can at least deliver a ticket.
Nathan ("Stump"):How far away is it?
Corey (DM):Dm a good distance. It might take you going through the grass, you know, Might take. You get 15 minutes to.
Nathan ("Stump"):Okay, I can't. I can't throw them that far.
Corey (DM):No.
Lauren ("EZ"):Okay. I'm feeling slappy. So let's go.
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah.
Corey (DM):You begin to make your way through. Are you all just walking behind Stump? Stump, you carrying them? Because that's. The grass is taller than you two.
Nathan ("Stump"):Say, probably both of you guys on my shoulders.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay. Yep.
Nathan ("Stump"):And I'm just like, okay, lead the way.
Lauren ("EZ"):Are we going to.
Nick (E'Louie):He says, can I have a lift?
Nathan ("Stump"):Of course.
Lauren ("EZ"):So we both get on there. Can we, like, hold hands as we go?
Corey (DM):At this point, Easy. At this point, like, you have lost control of gravity, so. Oh, you are. However you all are carrying. Easy. Whether. Easy's a balloon up in the sky.
Nathan ("Stump"):Like, yeah, it's stump. It just has the rope like a balloon.
Corey (DM):Easy. Are you just, like, letting yourself fly free?
Nathan ("Stump"):You could get a great.
Corey (DM):Attached to the rope.
Lauren ("EZ"):I know, I'm just. Yeah, that's fine. I thought it would be cute to have both of us on stump shoulders.
Corey (DM):But, I mean, stump could pull you.
Lauren ("EZ"):Down, you know, but no, I'll get a good view and I'll just get, you know, the fresh air and just soak it all in.
Nathan ("Stump"):Tell us where to go.
Corey (DM):Onward.
Lauren ("EZ"):Ahoy.
Corey (DM):Well, I would say from your vantage point, since you're, like, up higher now, floating. As you all are getting closer, you do notice that there is actually a small structure and you see a large clearing.
As you approach the clearing, weaving around tall grass and trying to stay on the path the best you can, you hear a noise coming from inside the flora. A towering humanoid shape made entirely of braided grass, vines, flowers, and soil, standing around 7ft tall, rises from the grass into your path.
Its face is just a sign that says no Mo. And it is half embedded in the leaves. It blocks your path. Wielding a weapon made of tree vines and packed soil.
It points its weapon in your direction. And a voice comes from within. No mowing allowed. Turn back or face punishment.
Nathan ("Stump"):Yes. Don't agree. No mow, he says.
Nick (E'Louie):Oh, hello there. Well, we're here to help. We don't like that people are mowing either.
And we've been sent to find the people doing it and to tell them not to do it anymore. What's your name, fella?
Corey (DM):We are the Mowing Guardians.
Nick (E'Louie):Oh. Well, we're here to help you. Is there anyone around here that you've seen that's been mowing that we can help you let know they shouldn't be doing?
So?
Corey (DM):Somebody's cut and mowed in the clearing.
Nick (E'Louie):And it was you. No, no, no. Well, come on now. You can. You can't accuse us of doing a thing like that. We're here to help you. You.
Corey (DM):You see our stump? This is something you notice. You see a bunch of small, tiny blades of grass begin to, like, float around his head, like, whispering in his ear.
And he's, like, looks at you, this time directly. Stump. And he points his weapon at you and says, they've told me about you.
Nathan ("Stump"):How is Stump supposed to know grass can talk?
Nick (E'Louie):So E steps up and says, oh, I think we have a great misunderstanding.
Lauren ("EZ"):We are new here.
Nick (E'Louie):My friend here, he's a very kind person. But he's got the brain the size of a peanut. And he made a mistake, but we've corrected it since.
And if we can just help him know the way, then he'll do what we need to do.
Nathan ("Stump"):It'll grow back.
Corey (DM):Now, Stump, you have no care for the sacred grass. Your feelings, those who don't care.
Nathan ("Stump"):Yeah, Stump love grass. Now, Stump turn over new blade of grass. And he winks at the grass monster. So why don't we help people who are much worse than Stump?
I mean, could help you find people who are much worse than Stump.
Corey (DM):Now, are you being honest? Are you trying to deceive this creature?
Nathan ("Stump"):I think Stump is not being honest. Honestly.
Corey (DM):All right. Roll me a deception check.
Lauren ("EZ"):Oh, boy. You gotta be honest.
Nathan ("Stump"):I think Stump is really just trying to say what the thing. What he thinks it wants to hear.
Nick (E'Louie):Yes.
Corey (DM):Yeah.
Nathan ("Stump"):Yeah. That's an 11.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay, okay.
Nathan ("Stump"):It's minus one.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay, okay.
Corey (DM):So 10. You know, I'm gonna roll a challenge of that.
Nathan ("Stump"):Hell, yeah. Bring it on.
Corey (DM):That'll be a 13. Opposed.
Lauren ("EZ"):So.
Nathan ("Stump"):Whoops.
Corey (DM):He sees right through your ruse. He says you're like others who come and destroy the beautiful life around us. You will answer for mowing.
And behind you all you see two more of these guardians arise.
Lauren ("EZ"):Do we not get warning?
Corey (DM):You would have if one of you did not already cut the grass and then try to light it. Let's roll for initiative.
Nathan ("Stump"):I mean, all we got to do is just cut more grass, right?
Corey (DM):Okay, so the order Stump, you will be going first. Then it will be the Guardians of Mowing, then E. And then. Easy. So Stump, you find yourself in the tall grass surrounded.
There is one in front of you and two behind. And these large creatures have. It says no mo on their face, but they're like no mowing signs that have been completely engulfed inside of them.
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah.
Corey (DM):And the. The quest that you were still supposed to find is beyond these ones that are now blocking your path.
Who accused you, which rightfully did accuse one of you for cutting and breaking one of the sacred laws.
Nathan ("Stump"):For a stupid law. That's dumb.
Corey (DM):So, stuff. What would you like to do? The first one is about. I would say it's about 15ft in front of you. The other two are behind you about another 15, 20ft.
So it's almost like they're a triangle.
Nathan ("Stump"):Gotcha. Okay, I'm gonna enter a rage.
Corey (DM):All right. Bonus action rage.
Nathan ("Stump"):And then I am going to. I gotta figure out, okay, I'm gonna just do an attack with my great axe.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay. Okay.
Nathan ("Stump"):So. So I'm going to roll to hit.
Corey (DM):Absolutely.
Nick (E'Louie):You are.
Corey (DM):Which one are you hitting? The one in front of you.
Nathan ("Stump"):Yeah, I'm going to get. Go up to the one in front of me after I enter rage. And I'm going to attack with my great X.
Corey (DM):Absolutely.
Nathan ("Stump"):Okay, that's a 16.
Corey (DM):I will say that hits.
Nathan ("Stump"):Okay. And then I roll one D12 plus four. That's four plus four. So eight.
Corey (DM):Eight. Okay. All right. So it is now the guardian's turn. Okay, so the one that was just hit by Stump just took some damage, is now even more pissed off.
You see, like the vines grow a little bit longer on it as it is angry. You see some of its branches fall off of its body. Some of the soil kind of breaks down.
This thing just lets out kind of a shriek and it is going to pull up its weapon that is made of like, vines and soil and everything else, but very hardened. 21 tier AC. All right, perfect.
Lauren ("EZ"):They're just doing their job. This sucks.
Nathan ("Stump"):I want to use Stone's endurance as a reaction too.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay.
Corey (DM):What does that do it.
Nathan ("Stump"):Reduces the damage dealt to me by 1d12 +3.
Nick (E'Louie):Wow.
Corey (DM):How many times can you do that? Is that like a short rest? Nice. You can do that once now. Perfect.
Nathan ("Stump"):Yes.
Corey (DM):So he did 10 damage to you.
Nathan ("Stump"):Okay, so that's four plus three, which is seven.
Corey (DM):All right, so you're gonna take one damage.
Nathan ("Stump"):Cool.
Corey (DM):Which is going to be halved because that is physical damage to you. So I'm just gonna call that a zero.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay.
Nathan ("Stump"):Thanks dm. Yep.
Corey (DM):So it's like it gets clunk, you know, hits you. But lucky for this guardian is it gets two attacks.
Nathan ("Stump"):Okay.
Nick (E'Louie):Oh, snaps.
Corey (DM):Oh, 16 plus four. Dirty 20. All right, so this time it's going to hit you for two damage.
Nathan ("Stump"):Okay.
Corey (DM):All right. So that was the first one's attack. The other two from behind you. They are not too concerned about the two little ones.
They are more concerned about the one who has caused the mowing infraction. Yeah boy. So both of them are also attacking you.
Nathan ("Stump"):Maybe we should like try to talk to these guys.
Corey (DM):You didn't try to lie to them.
Nathan ("Stump"):You guys should try to talk to these guys.
Corey (DM):Seven tier AC.
Nathan ("Stump"):I'm pretty sure. Yeah, that hits.
Lauren ("EZ"):Yeah.
Corey (DM):Seven hits you.
Nathan ("Stump"):No, 17.
Corey (DM):No, 17.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay.
Corey (DM):I was like dang.
Nick (E'Louie):Oh boy.
Corey (DM):Okay. I don't know why I even asked. That was also a 7 leathery loincloth. Luckily they have multiple attacks. 13. No, 13 does not hit you as well.
And Last attack is 18 plus 4.
Nathan ("Stump"):That hits.
Corey (DM):All right, so one of those hits you. Three damage. So now E, you are up.
Nick (E'Louie):Up stumps like laughing like he's being tickled.
Nathan ("Stump"):Say Stump is like, all right, I stump get it. Okay, no more.
Corey (DM):Okay.
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah. Okay, so ease up.
Okay, so he wants to use non lethal attacks and so he's gonna go up and attack the first one he can see that's on stump and he's gonna use a two handed bow staff.
Corey (DM):Okay, now by non lethal. Are you just trying to like break them apart?
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah, I'm trying to like knock one down or out or get them off of stunt, but I'm really not trying to kill them. One because we're not, you know, we're. We're trying to play well and you know, not take them out.
Corey (DM):Gotcha. All right, roll, roll and tech roll.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay, here we go. So I got a D20 to hit plus six. So it's gonna be a 16 and six.
Corey (DM):Oh yeah.
Nick (E'Louie):Two and then we're gonna do a damage of one D8 plus four. Wow. Rolling eight. So that is nice. 12 damage.
Corey (DM):Okay.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay. We need a key point or a key or a focus.
Corey (DM):Focus point now. Yeah.
Nick (E'Louie):Focus. To do fury of blows. That gives me two unarmed strikes. Yep. And both are a plus six. Wow. So we got a 21 and a 19. And then so damage or 2D six plus four.
Wow. Six and a four. Man, I'm killing it on this roll.
Corey (DM):All right, so you said you want this to be non. Lethal.
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah.
Corey (DM):So this was enough to.
Nick (E'Louie):If.
Corey (DM):If you were trying to kill it, it would have basically killed it at this point. So how do you want to non lethally get this thing away from Stump?
Nick (E'Louie):So I run up to the thing, and I'm, like, hitting it in the. In, like, what would be the kidneys that may not exist in this kind of thing.
To get its attention as it leans back, I take the end of my beard, which is six feet long, and wrap it around its neck. And then I push my feet on the back of its head to create pressure around its neck until the thing passes out.
Corey (DM):Okay, so you're knocking him out, by that way. I love it.
Nathan ("Stump"):Beard tech.
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Corey (DM):Easy. You see, you just kind of climb on up, you know, pop up a couple fast ones to the kidney wraps, you know, the beard around, puts it to sleep.
And you see this, and you're like, well, I guess it's my turn. What do you do? Easy.
Lauren ("EZ"):I think about how agile this old man is.
Corey (DM):Yeah.
Lauren ("EZ"):Like, yeah.
Corey (DM):Surprisingly, for how old E is, the way he moved was. Was very, very crazy.
Lauren ("EZ"):Yeah, that's. That's.
Nick (E'Louie):Oh. And the entire time he's doing it, he has small grunts.
Nathan ("Stump"):A couple laughs in there, too.
Lauren ("EZ"):A bunch of noise.
Corey (DM):He's like, what?
Lauren ("EZ"):So there's some effort. Okay, so I feel bad because. Because we're, like, kind of like fighting the police, right?
Nathan ("Stump"):Yes, the police.
Lauren ("EZ"):My goodness.
Nick (E'Louie):Oh, my goodness.
Lauren ("EZ"):Oh, my.
Nick (E'Louie):So.
Lauren ("EZ"):Oh. But I don't want them to hurt Stumpy and made a mistake. And we're here.
Nathan ("Stump"):So many mistakes.
Corey (DM):Y.
Lauren ("EZ"):And. And I'm like, can you give us a break? Like, seriously, we just got here, and I love this place so much.
Corey (DM):I mean, you don't have to use your turn to attack. You can do other things.
Lauren ("EZ"):No, because if I don't attack, then they're gonna attack you all.
Nathan ("Stump"):So would it help if we showed him our note?
Corey (DM):Like, hey, we definitely haven't done that yet.
Nathan ("Stump"):Look, we're here to help. Look at denote.
Nick (E'Louie):That guy.
Nathan ("Stump"):That guy's dumb.
Corey (DM):I don't know him.
Lauren ("EZ"):Let me see here. I want to go up there. And then I just kind of show the orb then. And I'm like, truly, we mean no harm.
We just got here a day ago, and we're trying our best to acclimate to the new society. And I'm being sincere, and I say that as well.
Corey (DM):Roll me.
Nick (E'Louie):I am sincere. Can you see the look in my eyes?
Corey (DM):Roll me.
Nathan ("Stump"):Persuasion, right?
Corey (DM):Yes, Persuasion. Thank you. Yeah, roll me. Persuasion, check.
Lauren ("EZ"):I rolled an 11.
Corey (DM):Okay, awesome. An 11 to try to convince you were successful. Okay, so as you say that, you know, the second one that is behind Stomp catches.
You know, you catch his attention. He turns around, He's. He's beginning to raise his weapon at you.
But you hold that orb up and he immediately recognizes knowing that that is from the dmv. And he. He looks at you, and the second one's like, bring that to me, please, so I may look into it and see that you are telling the truth.
Lauren ("EZ"):Can. Can I do some. Man, I wish it was an insight. Or maybe I can do a perception, because insight. Perception is better. But can I do some kind of check?
Corey (DM):Insight would be.
Nathan ("Stump"):It feels so insight.
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah. The character.
Lauren ("EZ"):So wish me luck, everybody.
Nick (E'Louie):You got this. No big deal. This is the one you've been waiting on.
Nathan ("Stump"):Sixteen plus what?
Lauren ("EZ"):Not plus, minus one. So 15.
Nathan ("Stump"):Pretty good.
Nick (E'Louie):Still.
Corey (DM):No, that's pretty good. He's saying with authority, like, there's no, like, evil intent, nothing like that. Like, he needs to verify.
Lauren ("EZ"):Okay, so I was like, we mean no harm, Truly. And then I hand him.
Corey (DM):He pulls it up to what you would assume is the face, but it's that no mowing sign, you know? But he still holds it up there. And then he pulls it down, hands it back to you and says, you are telling the truth.
Lauren ("EZ"):Yes, sir.
Corey (DM):You and this one. But why did this one break the sacred laws?
Nick (E'Louie):I tried to tell you.
Lauren ("EZ"):We're brand spanking new here.
Nick (E'Louie):Goliath has the brain the size of a peanut, but he really, truly means. Not means well.
Corey (DM):And we'll do our best to keep.
Nick (E'Louie):An eye on them. Stomp, come on.
Nathan ("Stump"):I mean, mean, it's like a haircut, right?
Nick (E'Louie):No, just Stomp, please. Just keep your mouth shut for a moment, lad, so we don't get back in another fight here.
Nathan ("Stump"):It was. Stop. Just nervous.
Corey (DM):As you can tell. You are new. We will give you that this time.
Lauren ("EZ"):Thank you, sir.
Corey (DM):Be aware, we guard those who mow. Don't do it again. They. They step aside to allow you to. And they point in the direction they're hiding somewhere over there. Take care of business.
Lauren ("EZ"):I curtsy.
Nick (E'Louie):Thank you very much. And you curtsy.
Lauren ("EZ"):I don't know what else to do.
Nick (E'Louie):Thank you very much. And he'll come around. Trust me. We'll take care of him. And he'll come around.
Nathan ("Stump"):Stump picks up some of the grass that he cut when he attacked him earlier, and he. He kind of pushes it back into the grasp monster. And then he gives him a kiss. There you go. See, he's okay. No harm.
All grass back, and it's like, kind of falling, like, sprinkling, like.
Nick (E'Louie):Oh.
Nathan ("Stump"):He picks it back up, puts it back.
Nick (E'Louie):All good. Oh, goodness. Okay. Very good, Stump. It's a time to move on.
Lauren ("EZ"):Oh, you are so tender and so sweet.
Corey (DM):They begin to, like, move back and then dip back into the grass and almost disappear and fade away. Yeah. Okay.
Nathan ("Stump"):Do the signs, like, turn back into signs where they go?
Corey (DM):Nope, they stay. Yeah, they. Signs disappear. Like, they don't disappear. They just disappear into the grass.
Nathan ("Stump"):Oh, okay. Okay. Gotcha.
Lauren ("EZ"):What an exist.
Nick (E'Louie):Did they, like. Do they, like, back up slowly or as they're like turn around, they just kind of back up and duck and then they're like.
Corey (DM):Yep, then they're gone.
Lauren ("EZ"):Back up and duck. All right, that's.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay. So E wants to. So E says, now, let's be very sneaky, Stump. You might stay behind a moment.
Nathan ("Stump"):Stump, great. That sneak.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay.
Nathan ("Stump"):Crouches. He's like, see, Stump basically invisible.
Nick (E'Louie):And so he. He wants to sneak forward and do a perception or. Or look around for a bad guy. He wants to.
Corey (DM):Or you can try to go into the clearing in the tall grass.
Nick (E'Louie):No, I'm going to go in the tall grass as far as I can go around the edge. He's gonna go toward the direction of the structure slowly and then. And stealthily and to, like, toward that area.
Just looking for any signs of situation.
Nathan ("Stump"):I want to come with you, but I feel like I've been really annoying this session.
Nick (E'Louie):You should totally.
Nathan ("Stump"):Is it okay if I follow?
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah.
Nathan ("Stump"):Okay.
Nick (E'Louie):All right.
Nathan ("Stump"):Stump is following. Crouched.
Nick (E'Louie):Keep it low. Get her down here. Yeah, Underneath the grass level and stay crouched. I think we'll be okay.
Nathan ("Stump"):Get down a little, Fitz monster. And Stump pulls you down, like, a little closer.
Corey (DM):Yeah, there you go.
Lauren ("EZ"):And I go like a little doggy.
Corey (DM):All right, E, why don't you give me a perception check?
Nick (E'Louie):Wow. NAT one.
Nathan ("Stump"):There it is.
Nick (E'Louie):We've had a one and a 20 this session.
Corey (DM):Yep, yep. Absolutely. All right.
So as you begin to, you know, so you're crouching, moving around, making your way through, you begin to look through the grass, looking in towards the buildings there and you notice that there is a structure in the back. And in the back where the structure is, this is a very large round circular opening.
One thing that you do notice though, like you do see the structure in the back, but you see the grass that has been cut down. You see these perfect stripes cut into the grass.
Like the most beautiful manicured suburban, which we all know those are terrible lawns, but like the most like suburban, like clean cut stripes are in there. Prized, you know, lawn like this has been mowed by someone who knows how to mow.
Nathan ("Stump"):Eloise like. Yeah, that's some Kentucky blue right there.
Lauren ("EZ"):Yeah, I could see it all over his face. That's what he was thinking.
Nick (E'Louie):Yep. And from Kentucky.
Corey (DM):Yeah. And so you begin to look around and you see down towards where that building is. You do notice that there are some.
Some heads kind of popping from behind the building, kind of looking towards yalls way. They don't necessarily notice you, but you notice them.
Nick (E'Louie):Heck yeah. Thank you. DM okay, so. So E. So how many? Just some heads. A couple. Just two, three.
Corey (DM):Couple that you've seen you.
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah, we definitely see some heads like.
Corey (DM):So two at least.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay, so. So take some wants to say something.
Nathan ("Stump"):Look, friends say hello. No, no, they all stomping stinky.
Nick (E'Louie):I mean, you've got to listen to me, lad. There are some people. No, there are people there that we need to speak with. But that's.
Nathan ("Stump"):That's what Stump is saying.
Nick (E'Louie):They're sneaking around too.
Nathan ("Stump"):They can't be a good people, both of us sneaking. We have so much in common.
Lauren ("EZ"):And then I try to go look and I kind of like doggy.
Nick (E'Louie):What are you doing? Stok, pull her down.
Nathan ("Stump"):Stoke pulls her down.
Nick (E'Louie):No, just wait a second. We need to be thoughtful about what we're going to do here.
Nathan ("Stump"):Okay, okay, stop. Listen.
Nick (E'Louie):Oh, man. And he sits and he pulls his beard again. What to do?
Nathan ("Stump"):Say hello to them.
Lauren ("EZ"):Say hello to them.
Nick (E'Louie):I tell you what, you stay here and you wait for my signal. I'm gonna go a little further and see if I can get them by surprise.
Nathan ("Stump"):Okay. What signal be?
Nick (E'Louie):The signal will be. This is the signal. Get your ass out of here and do something now. They might be friendly, but we don't really know.
But they are hiding from us, so we need to be aware.
Lauren ("EZ"):I bet they are friendly.
Nick (E'Louie):Let me go find out. You stay here. Just don't keep her down below the grass level down low.
Nathan ("Stump"):Don't do this. Don't do this.
Corey (DM):All right, so you're gonna like sneak away around the outer.
Nick (E'Louie):I want to get. I want to sneak around closer to get. To get a little bit of a jump on them to see what. What's going on over there.
Corey (DM):Okay.
Nick (E'Louie):So I'm staying out of the clear into the grass.
Corey (DM):Yeah, perfect. Roll me a stealth check.
Nathan ("Stump"):Check. Come on.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay. Oh, that's not. That's not too bad. That's a 16.
Corey (DM):I was like 6. All right.
Nick (E'Louie):That's an 18. Yeah. And I think I'm pretty good on 18. 18 and 6.
Nathan ("Stump"):That's a sneaky dwarf form.
Nick (E'Louie):A sneaky, sneaky monkey dwarf.
Nathan ("Stump"):You're very sneaky dwarf.
Corey (DM):Yeah, I mean you are doing a very good job of like. And luckily since you're so small, it's so much easier for you to kind of sneak through the grass.
Nick (E'Louie):Grass. Yeah, yeah.
Corey (DM):As you make your way through the grass, their, their vision is still kind of focused because obviously, obviously they heard the fight, they heard the commotion, so their eyes are still focused on that. As you make your way to the back to where that cabin is, that structure is towards the back of this property.
You get there, no problem, you know, no issues.
When you get to the air and you kind of poke your head through just a little bit to see what's going on, you do see this is about a one bedroom cabin the size, not one room, but like one room with an extra, extra actual bedroom attached to it. You know, decent size, little structure, log cabin. There's a lot of just like janky old farm equipment here.
And you do see like through a window you see there's an old man kind of just sitting on his rocker in the house.
But behind this building that as you open up and look into it, you see that there are four human men just like poking their head from behind the cabin looking towards yalls direction. They're all wearing these like just, just past their knee, like denim shorts.
Lauren ("EZ"):Are they cut offs?
Corey (DM):They're. They're not cut offs. They're like just denim shorts. But they're also wearing like really tall like white socks.
Nick (E'Louie):Are these redneck with white. Tall white socks?
Lauren ("EZ"):Are they wearing new balances with grass stains on them?
Corey (DM):You do notice that their shoes have like an N in them. Get out of here. They all have their shirts tucked in and.
Nick (E'Louie):What in the world.
Nathan ("Stump"):Doing the dungeons and daddies crossover already. This is amazing.
Nick (E'Louie):And they're hiding.
Corey (DM):They're just like peeking around the corner looking in the direction. But you do see that they do have two lawnmowers with them.
Nick (E'Louie):Rule breakers Those. Wow.
Lauren ("EZ"):Brave, brave men.
Nick (E'Louie):What's he gonna do?
Nathan ("Stump"):Stump pulls Fitz monster down close. He's like. So he's probably dead. Oh, no, it's. Stump is really good at this sort of thing.
Lauren ("EZ"):And then I'm really fighting to like.
Nathan ("Stump"):No, come back, Come back.
Lauren ("EZ"):Get back.
Nathan ("Stump"):Listen, don't stop. It's gonna be okay.
Lauren ("EZ"):Can I do like a strength to.
Nick (E'Louie):Like the doggy paddle?
Corey (DM):Yeah, with disadvantage? Yes, you can.
Nathan ("Stump"):And do I roll against that? Like, is it.
Corey (DM):Well, because she has no, like, actual, like, gravity and way to like, grab on to pull away, so it's gonna be with disadvantage.
Lauren ("EZ"):I rolled like an 18 and then a 5.
Corey (DM):Yeah, you're at the whim of Stump.
Lauren ("EZ"):It's a strong rope.
Nathan ("Stump"):Listen, it's okay.
Nick (E'Louie):Well, you're. You're paddling against air. It's not water.
Corey (DM):There's nothing physically you're grabbing onto what?
Nick (E'Louie):It's like this.
Lauren ("EZ"):Oh, what was that? Why can't I help?
Nick (E'Louie):What is he gonna do?
Lauren ("EZ"):Why are you doing this alone?
Nick (E'Louie):E is going to. He's just gonna go back and he's gonna. He's gonna tell. He's gonna. He's gonna come back and he's gonna say. He's gonna say. Okay, here's what I've said.
Nathan ("Stump"):Oh, you're alive.
Nick (E'Louie):Keep your voice down. And keep her down as well. Stumble. Goodness gracious. There's four men with cutoff shorts and what high socks in New Balance shoes.
Lauren ("EZ"):I don't think they're cut off shorts.
Nick (E'Louie):Huh? They're jean cut off shorts.
Lauren ("EZ"):He said that they weren't cut off.
Corey (DM):They're technically just like, not cut. They're. They're hemmed up.
Nick (E'Louie):They call them Daisy Dukes. There's four men in dudes.
Corey (DM):They're Daisy Dukes now.
Nick (E'Louie):No, I'm a little older. I don't really know the ways and the times and the things, but I like the shoes. And there's an old man inside.
Nathan ("Stump"):Stump only speak common so. And not understanding.
Nick (E'Louie):They do have the lawn mowers. And so I know that they're the ones. They're the ones doing the mowing.
Nathan ("Stump"):Oh, the creatures say no mow, but they have a. A mower.
Nick (E'Louie):Here's what I'd like to do.
Nathan ("Stump"):We should go break these.
Lauren ("EZ"):I think we should go have a beer with them.
Nick (E'Louie):I think what? I think you all should a beer. Good Lord. I can't believe I'm saying this.
I think y' all should sneak around to the back, let me go out into the front and talk to him. And if they Attack me. Then you can. You can surprise them.
Lauren ("EZ"):I'll go with you. And then Stump can come from behind.
Nathan ("Stump"):Yes, Stump be back up. Yeah, Stump, go hide.
Nick (E'Louie):Why do I feel.
Lauren ("EZ"):Hold my rope.
Nick (E'Louie):Stump terribly uneasy about this situation?
Corey (DM):Yeah, you tell me what you want to do.
Nathan ("Stump"):You go talk to them.
Lauren ("EZ"):Okay. And Stomp, give him my rope.
Nathan ("Stump"):Stomp will wait for order to break mower.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay, well, okay, if I call for you, I'll say, now Stomp.
Nathan ("Stump"):Yes. Okay, Stomp.
Nick (E'Louie):I'll say now Stomp. And then you need to come out and help us if we need you. All right? What?
Nathan ("Stump"):Stomp hit first.
Nick (E'Louie):In the mean, if they're attacking us, you need to attack them too.
Nathan ("Stump"):Okay, so I hit the guys with no balance.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay. So Easy takes the rope and he's just gonna straight walk back out into the clearing with. Easy as a balloon.
Lauren ("EZ"):Yeah, it'll be like a balloon.
Nathan ("Stump"):And Stump wants to position himself to where, I guess on the edge of like the grass. And he can like, see out. Okay. And just waiting for the signal and oh my goodness. Trying to fight his urge to go just smash the mower.
Corey (DM):Perfect Question.
Lauren ("EZ"):If I touch the ring, if I touch ease ring, would that give me any benefit?
Nick (E'Louie):Nope.
Lauren ("EZ"):Okay.
Nick (E'Louie):You have to be wearing the ring.
Lauren ("EZ"):I was like, I was wondering if.
Nick (E'Louie):I invisible touched it. I mean, have no gravity.
Corey (DM):Yep.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay, have gravity.
Corey (DM):Okay. So you begin to walk into the clearing, holding easy, floating on the balloon.
Nick (E'Louie):And he says, hello there.
Corey (DM):Hello.
Nick (E'Louie):We've come to. We're friendly folk and we've come to.
Corey (DM):Give a message hello immediately as you like walk out there and you're saying that you're getting closer. All four of them come from behind the building and they're cheering and shouting and they're like, yeah, they're slapping each other on the back.
They run up to you, they grab your hand, start shaking it, and they're like, oh, my God, did you see what he did to that. That creep? Those freaking guardians of movie. He took him out. He shakes your hand. He's like, well, put her there, chief. It's so good to see you.
Nathan ("Stump"):Stump is like shaking. He's like, I knew they were friends.
Corey (DM):And okay, so I knew that they.
Lauren ("EZ"):Would be and I wanted so badly. Have a brewski with them. So.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay. So he's like, well, I think, yeah, thank you very much.
Lauren ("EZ"):Yeah.
Nick (E'Louie):And shaking their hand and. And then, and then he says, he said, well, I have another friend here with me somewhere. Where'd he run off to?
And he says, stump, Stomp, come out and, and and shake their hands.
Nathan ("Stump"):Okay, that's close to signal. But they're not signal.
Nick (E'Louie):Don't.
Lauren ("EZ"):Don't hurt the shoes.
Nathan ("Stump"):Stop. Not mess anything up again. Wait for right signal. Stomp. Wait. Right.
Nick (E'Louie):So he looks around, and that looked.
Nathan ("Stump"):Like so much fun. But Stump have to wait for correct symbol that was told to stomp.
Nick (E'Louie):Stump, where are you? Well, he'll show up, surely in the moment. Well, you boys. Well, what's going on out here? And what. What are your names?
My name is E. Louis, and you can call me. And this is my friend here.
Lauren ("EZ"):Easy, easy.
Corey (DM):The first guy's like, hello, my name is Bruce Halfacre. It's so great to meet you. Oh, my God. Listen here, sport. What you did out there was pure freaking genius. And then another guy comes out.
He's like, well, my name's Timothy Clean Cut. You dirty old son of a. I see what you did to him. Oh, my gosh. I got to buy you a beer.
Nathan ("Stump"):I love Timothy Clean Cut.
Corey (DM):Another guy pops up. Well, my friend, my name Carl Greenwell. Hell yeah, brother. I saw the way you took him out, man. We need him on our team now.
Another guy, and the fourth guy comes around, he's like, listen here, son. I'm Elias Bent Blade. And my God, you fight with such honor and prejudice. You don't understand.
We're just out here trying to bring a new balance to this world.
Nick (E'Louie):Oh, my. And you just helped the cause.
Corey (DM):You took out that song bitch out there. And now we're.
Nick (E'Louie):We're.
Corey (DM):Oh, my gosh. We're one. Do you not see how beautiful this lawn is?
Nathan ("Stump"):Corey, how long have you been holding on to the new balance?
Corey (DM):Oh, I've been waiting to say that.
Nathan ("Stump"):That's so good.
Lauren ("EZ"):Trying to bring a new balance.
Nick (E'Louie):So, okay. So he says, well, that's very interesting. Very interesting. And it's so nice to meet you. And so we've. We've come on a bit of business now, and.
Corey (DM):Business, hell. Get this guy a beer.
Nick (E'Louie):We'll talk.
Lauren ("EZ"):What about me? No.
Corey (DM):Yeah, we'll get you one, too. Hey, we got. Got the barbecue going. Don't you worry. We're gonna. We're gonna feast it up right now before we head out of here. But throw down.
Lauren ("EZ"):I'm a woman, but I can throw down.
Corey (DM):It's so great to have some more promoers in our presence. Yeah, we're gonna. We're gonna cut some grass together.
Nick (E'Louie):Oh, well, okay. If you've offered a beer, I can't turn you down on that one, that's for sure.
Lauren ("EZ"):Let's just have a beer and then, and then we'll talk business.
Nick (E'Louie):And he says, he says, okay, now I apologize. My, we must have lost our friends. And he says, stump, Stump, come on out now and meet our friends.
Nathan ("Stump"):Very close. Elui testing. Stump. Stump will not fail.
Lauren ("EZ"):He's trying so hard. Just wants to do the right thing.
Nathan ("Stump"):It looked like so much fun to Stump.
Nick (E'Louie):So he says, why don't you take my friend here? She's got a bit of a gravity problem.
If you could just take her with you and then let me run out here and find my friend and I'll be right back and we'll share a. A beer together. A pint or two. Oh, yeah.
Corey (DM):And he looks at you easy. Grabs the rope from, from you. Grabs easy, pulls you down like. Well, little, little Phil, you don't need to be just floating on up there.
And he like reaches in his reaches in his pocket, grabs out a ring and says, well, here you go. Why don't you get your feet back on the ground?
Lauren ("EZ"):They think I'm a fella. Okay.
Corey (DM):I'm like, congrats, you got a gravity ring. I mean, with muscles like that, you will find fella, right?
Lauren ("EZ"):Oh, no, I'm just a big old bra. Thank you.
Corey (DM):Oh, shoot. Oh, I'm so sorry. Well, you remind me of my wife. God bless her soul.
Lauren ("EZ"):Oh my goodness.
Nick (E'Louie):Bless her rest bless. That's a big difference.
Lauren ("EZ"):Okay, I put, I, I thank them.
Corey (DM):And then I put the ring on immediately, like, okay. You can feel the weight of yourself.
Lauren ("EZ"):I knew I didn't have to pay for it.
Nick (E'Louie):He says, I'll see you lads and, and lesson. Just a moment. Moment. And he runs off and he's like, stomp. And he's looking for Stump in the weeds.
Corey (DM):Yeah, Stump. Do you show yourself to E?
Nathan ("Stump"):No, he's watching. He's like, stump too good. Stump too good stuff.
Nick (E'Louie):Wait. He's like, stump, where are you? Stomp, come back. Where are you?
Lauren ("EZ"):What? Would I have seen where Stump was in when I was.
Nick (E'Louie):Well, I knew where he was. Well, I guess he did move.
Corey (DM):Did you move or did you stay where you were at?
Nathan ("Stump"):Yeah, I moved. And I'm like hiding in the grass, like at the edge. And I'm like watching.
Lauren ("EZ"):Would I have seen him?
Corey (DM):Would you have been looking for him to keep an eye on stuff?
Nathan ("Stump"):You guys should go ahead and things might go south. It might be good that I'm back up still. Okay, I think you guys should proceed.
Nick (E'Louie):So elui looks around for a while and should I just roll A check to see if I can find him.
Corey (DM):Sure, I'll let you roll. One investigation.
Nick (E'Louie):Investigation. Okay. It's a seven. Yeah.
Corey (DM):You don't know where he's at exactly. He moved locations.
Nick (E'Louie):So I'm like, this is getting weir. You know, Easy's back there. So Eluie's feeling real weird about just leaving her with a bunch of cut off Jean short folks, you know? Blast. Blimey.
Okay, so he turns around and he just runs back and joins up with them and has a beer with him.
Corey (DM):Ah, perfect. Yeah.
So there as you walk back to the other side of this cabin here, they've already got this grill pulled out and they're like pumping this thing full of charcoal. They've already got this sucker lit and they're getting ready to go.
You see the old farmer who was in the building, he walks out holding a tray of like, freshly cut, like, meat. He brings out this tray and he's like, well, hello fellas. Thank you for coming. Saving my lawn.
You know, I was worried they're gonna kill me, but save my lawn. So we're gonna eat good tonight.
Nick (E'Louie):What are we gonna do here?
Lauren ("EZ"):Why does everyone think I'm a fella?
Nathan ("Stump"):Kill these.
Nick (E'Louie):Hey, fellas, look at.
Corey (DM):Look at you two little fellas over there.
Nathan ("Stump"):Fellas. They think women can't have muscles killed.
Lauren ("EZ"):Okay? I have boobs. I don't know.
Nick (E'Louie):So. So we have a brew ski or two. Ski. Okay.
Corey (DM):Oh, yeah.
Nick (E'Louie):E is like, well, now I've got to talk to you lads about something that we're here for. And we found ourselves in quite an interesting situation. You see.
Lauren ("EZ"):A pickle, if you will.
Nick (E'Louie):Yes.
Lauren ("EZ"):Like the ones on this burger.
Nick (E'Louie):It's more of a pickle. Now we' and we've shared a brew together. But the.
The reason that we're here is because we were sent by, well, what I gather is the folks that you're not too, too thankful for or that you like very much. It's the dmv. Do you know the dmv?
Lauren ("EZ"):They're all like, hey, it's okay. It's okay.
Corey (DM):You're with the dmv.
Lauren ("EZ"):He says, well, kind of.
Nick (E'Louie):We found ourselves in an interesting and peculiar, most peculiar situation. And we've been told to bring you notice. But goodness, we found such friends here that can share pints and drink with the best of them.
And I tell you what, how happy and jolly I am just for sharing a beer.
Corey (DM):Wait, wait, wait. You tell me you were gonna come inside us and give us a ticket for mowing, is that what you're gonna do?
Nick (E'Louie):And he says, well, now, that's what we've been instructed to do. But we don't. We. We don't know you folks that well until just now, and we seem to like what we know.
But we do have to give you a piece of paper here, and.
Lauren ("EZ"):And what you do with it is up to you. We're just.
Corey (DM):No, you don't understand. You don't understand those pieces of paper. How long have you been working for the dmv?
Nick (E'Louie):We just got, like, five hours, just yesterday.
Corey (DM):Oh, they're brainwashing you, then. You don't get it.
You would rather have all that tall vegetation when you can have this beautiful lawn and barbecues and friends and beers and buddies.
Lauren ("EZ"):What. What about music? Do you guys like music?
Corey (DM):Hell yeah, brother. You ever heard that song Watabad the Bataba by that guy, man? Rock or something like that, man? What are we talking about, man?
Nathan ("Stump"):Jazz, I think, man.
Corey (DM):J. Yeah, man. Jazz. That's his name. So he's.
Nick (E'Louie):So. He's laughing. He's like. Well, now, you have to remember where this is not something that we're totally aligned with over here.
Corey (DM):Then why are you giving me the paper, brother? Like, you don't have to work for them. You could be hanging out with us. We could be out cutting together right now.
Lauren ("EZ"):He does make a good point.
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah.
Nathan ("Stump"):Yeah.
Corey (DM):You're really gonna let the DMV tell you how to live your life? You. You.
Nick (E'Louie):What?
Corey (DM):You've been here not very. You said you barely been working for him. We've been at this for a very long time. Ever since the mo. Wars, we've been going at this strong.
We are here to make sure that we can cut everybody's lawn and down to that damn Run Tum Tugger.
Lauren ("EZ"):All right, who's. Who's that?
Nick (E'Louie):That.
Corey (DM):What do you mean, who's that? Rum Tum Tugger. We.
Lauren ("EZ"):I don't. I don't know.
Corey (DM):Oh, y' all that new.
Nick (E'Louie):Damn.
Nathan ("Stump"):Okay.
Corey (DM):Rum Tom Tugger. That's the God that they serve. He ain't my God. No, not my president. Yeah, that Rum Tom Tugger.
Nick (E'Louie):That's just the.
Corey (DM):The guy that everyone serves over there. And I. I. Now, I don't. I don't believe in the rum tum myself, because we believe that, you know, we. We serve Rufiogo.
That's the one that we pledge our allegiance to. So let me guess. You don't know who Rufiogo is either.
Lauren ("EZ"):Oh, why. Why would you be mad at people.
Corey (DM):Who don't know Well, I just want to make sure. Okay, here we go. Here's a little, little, little breakdown for it.
Lauren ("EZ"):Thank you.
Corey (DM):Okay. Rum Tom Tugger, giant cat God, lives in the sky. Very sparkly and it is lots of meow, meows and like. Like he. The. The Rum Tum Tugger is.
The one is why we can't cut the grass because the grass grows high. Cats like to hide in the grass. And when the people worship the Rum Tum Tugger, that's what keeps the water like, down.
Now for those of us, I don't know, some crazy people, and they built this world. That's what happened.
Now for those of us who serve roof yogo, we like to keep the grass low because when the grass is low, that is a lot more room for play and for hanging out and for family and for get togethers and for barbecue and for cornhole and those things.
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah.
Corey (DM):And so when we worship Rufiogo, which causes water to go back down. No. Causes water to go back up higher to piss off the cat God. And that's what we want to do. So that's what. That's. That's.
That's who the whole thing is, you know? So that's what's kind of caused a lot of these mo wars and things like that. But our.
Our plan is, is we're gonna go through and we're gonna mow all of this. We're gonna bring everything back to clean, to beautiful and to just community and family get together in. So that's what our plan is.
Now, I saw the way y' all took those suckers down those Guardians, so you obviously got to be on our side. I get that. So you can't be going and serving the DMV while also taking out the Guardians. There's some conflicts of interest there.
Nick (E'Louie):There.
Lauren ("EZ"):I mean, you're not wrong.
Nick (E'Louie):Well, that's a very interesting story you've got there, lady.
Corey (DM):Do you want to live under the rules of the DMV and this cat God that tells you you have to follow the rules, you have to. You have to have gravity. You have to do all this and that. Or do you want the freedom to do what you want to do? Well.
Nick (E'Louie):If you all wouldn't mind, would you excuse me so that I might have a word here with my. With my, My. My. My partner.
Lauren ("EZ"):That's not a man.
Nick (E'Louie):With my friend, my sister.
Corey (DM):All right, well, you know where we're gonna be. We're gonna keep flipping these burgers. They're gonna be done in about two minutes. We're all gonna eat, we're gonna have some fun.
We're gonna do some fellowshipping and we're gonna be some talking and then we're gonna have to get out of here. So I hope y' all come to your senses. We'll hang out.
Nathan ("Stump"):Just.
Corey (DM):Just let me know.
Nick (E'Louie):Thank you kindly. So E goes over and is like, like, hey, easy, come over here. And so think about this. We go over there and I'm like, where the hell is Stump?
Nathan ("Stump"):I guess you guys are like duning an aside, right?
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah, we're doing it.
Nathan ("Stump"):Stump pokes his head out the grass and he's like, hey, hey, guys.
Nick (E'Louie):And he's like, stump, get the hell over here.
Nathan ("Stump"):And you see Stump and he's got like some like mud and like twigs and it's like a mustache, like a fake mustache on him, like a nice disguise. Hey, hey, come over over here. Come to stop.
Nick (E'Louie):So he turns around and says, pardon us, we'll be right back. And then, and then we walk out. Okay, what are we gonna do here?
Corey (DM):And now let's take a minute to hear from our sponsor. Is your lawn growing a little too independent?
Nick (E'Louie):Have the guardians of mowing started circling clean your block, asking about blade marks?
Lauren ("EZ"):Hi, we're no Mo Problems.
Nathan ("Stump"):A discreet, off the books lawn care service for people who value order and plausible deniability.
Corey (DM):We offer midnight trims, patternless cuts, and.
Nathan ("Stump"):Gravity neutral edging, all performed by licensed dads with untraceable mowers.
Corey (DM):Are we licensed for life? That's right.
Lauren ("EZ"):Et cetera.
Nathan ("Stump"):No Mo Problems. Tmtm.
Lauren ("EZ"):We never existed.
Nick (E'Louie):Or did we send a carrier pigeon today?
Lauren ("EZ"):I, I really. I mean, they make some good points, but also, you know, we came to do a job, but I mean, they. Why would giving them a citation even bother them?
Like what? Like.
Nick (E'Louie):So we're gonna talk him into taking the citation.
Lauren ("EZ"):Yeah. And then be chill about it.
Nathan ("Stump"):You guys are out of character right now talking about it.
Nick (E'Louie):Oh, yeah.
Nathan ("Stump"):Okay, okay.
Lauren ("EZ"):No, well, we can go. I'm in character.
Corey (DM):Oh, oh, yeah.
Nick (E'Louie):I can't tell because yours is the same.
Corey (DM):The same voice.
Lauren ("EZ"):Yeah, yeah. It's just. It was a coincidence.
Nick (E'Louie):So. Okay, okay. So. So E says, what do you want to do here? These folks.
Nathan ("Stump"):You reckon it stumped?
Corey (DM):Oh, I got the.
Nathan ("Stump"):He takes the mustache down. It stomped.
Corey (DM):Oh, hey, buddy.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay, well, I wasn'. He pats him on the shoulder again and says, oh, I see now. It's you, Stump. Very good.
Nathan ("Stump"):You guys are getting along pretty well with these guys, huh? It looked like you're having lots of fun without Stomp. No signal ever. First stomp, stomp. Wait and wait.
Nick (E'Louie):Oh, well, I called for you and you're right to wait, I guess. Stump. Very good. Very good, lad.
Nathan ("Stump"):Stomp come up with idea while hiding.
Corey (DM):Oh, okay.
Lauren ("EZ"):What's the idea?
Nathan ("Stump"):You guys get them inside. Stomp smash mowers. Really good idea.
Lauren ("EZ"):Well, so they seem like. Oh, they seem like complicated fellows. You know, they do seem pretty cool.
But also, I think we just need to give them their citation and say it's nothing personal and, you know, we're just trying to make a life for.
Corey (DM):Ourselves and then leave.
Nick (E'Louie):Get any doubt? Yes, I.
Nathan ("Stump"):So you want to just give them the note and then we just leave?
Nick (E'Louie):I. Yeah, I think that's what we need to attempt to do what's really boring.
Lauren ("EZ"):So let's not try any violence.
Nathan ("Stump"):If this was a show, that would be very unsatisfying if that was the conclusion to this story.
Lauren ("EZ"):Well, we'll see what happens. They may not take kindly to the. To the notice.
Nathan ("Stump"):Okay.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay. All right.
Nathan ("Stump"):Well, Stump is going to go back. Back into the cognito.
Lauren ("EZ"):Oh, okay.
Nick (E'Louie):Put the mustache back.
Nathan ("Stump"):And then once you change your minds, Stump will break mowers.
Corey (DM):Good luck.
Nathan ("Stump"):And he goes back into the.
Lauren ("EZ"):Where'd he go? He's. It's just very.
Nathan ("Stump"):He's in the grass. He's going stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp.
Lauren ("EZ"):Like. Like a. Like cronk on predicting music.
Nick (E'Louie):And he says, okay, come on. Knee easy. Let's go back in. Man.
Lauren ("EZ"):They gave me a gravity ring. Okay, let's.
Corey (DM):That is true. They did give you a gravity ring. And it seems fully charged.
Nick (E'Louie):Okay, okay, so we go back in.
Lauren ("EZ"):And I can offer it back to them. Like, I. I just.
Corey (DM):Okay, I don't want.
Nick (E'Louie):Are you gonna do the talking or does he need to.
Lauren ("EZ"):You can. What's your charisma?
Nick (E'Louie):Negative one. So pretty good.
Lauren ("EZ"):Okay, so I should do the talking.
Nick (E'Louie):You get some riz. Okay.
Lauren ("EZ"):Yeah, I have plus zero.
Nathan ("Stump"):Oh, man.
Corey (DM):All right, so you two walk up to the dads, the mowing dads. What do you say? Hey, welcome back. We got some burgers. They handed like, two plates of burgers.
Like, this is like thick beef cut, you know, these are some thick burgers.
Lauren ("EZ"):And this isn't easy. And we really like you guys and we hope that we can.
Corey (DM):You know, we like you guys too.
Lauren ("EZ"):And I hope that. That, you know, that this isn't anything personal. But, like, can. Can we just like, give you this citation and.
Corey (DM):No, no, look, I don't think you'll understand. I tried to say this earlier before y' all interrupted me, but those tickets, they're not just pieces of paper.
They come to life if you write a citation for the dmv. They come to life.
Lauren ("EZ"):What does that mean?
Corey (DM):There's a lot more to this world that you don't know about, okay? You don't want to go messing with that stuff. I'm telling you, the minute you do that, you're gonna ruin everything.
Nick (E'Louie):I feel like we're, like, at this major crossroads of, like, are we gonna be bandits in this world or are we gonna play by the rules?
Corey (DM):Look, you just need to take some time to decide.
Are you gonna go work for the bureaucrats and do your little rules, do your little quests, or are you going to do what you did out there and take out those some bitches that are guarding all the mowing grasses and stuff? And you're going to. I saw the passion took. Take those guys out, you can have these beautiful lawns.
You can have a world where you're not covered in foliage every minute of every day. We could live a life. Our communities could be better.
Lauren ("EZ"):So, so easy. Has this big conviction because probably in her past life she would have, like, easily gave in to this and would have, like, like, sunk into it.
But, you know, that caused, you know, she was, like, married and divorced like, four or five times, and she really just does not, she just does not want that life for her. And she's trying to turn over a new plate of grass, as Stump said. And so I, I. So, man, please, please know that this isn't personal.
And then I give the citation.
Corey (DM):All right. Yeah, you give the citation.
Nick (E'Louie):He is staring at this con, at this situation, going down in a very, like, inquisitive or very, like, entertained kind of like, what is gonna happen now?
Corey (DM):The minute you hand them the citation, like, he takes like a deep breath and sighs and was like, I thought we could have worked together.
Lauren ("EZ"):We can.
Corey (DM):I thought we could have brought a better life to Zendaya. No, not now. Not after what you just did.
And the minute, like, he grabs that, that citation, the orb actually begins to light up and it shoots from your hand e and kind of goes up into the sky and it begins to, like, shoot out these strobes of light and sound. And it's just, it sends just kind of like a high pitched frequency. You can hear it, but it's not, like, painful, but you can hear it.
And it's just floating above the area where you're at now. And in the distance you start to hear like the trees or the, the high grass, like rustling.
And they look at you and they're just like, well, I guess it's just how it's going to be. And they all like immediately turn and just begin to run. They're grabbing their mowers and they're heading deeper into the grass.
And behind you you just see like a whole wave of those like mowing guardians.
Nick (E'Louie):The no mowers.
Corey (DM):The no Mowers. And also something else you notice.
Nick (E'Louie):Notice.
Corey (DM):You see the no mowers. But this is about five minutes after they got bit. About a five minute head start. And you're sitting there like, what is going on?
You see like a handful of those no mowers. But you also now notice about there's about seven other humanoids with them, all wearing official uniforms. And you all notice them from the dmv.
These were the people sitting in the waiting room. These were your victims. But they're all now wearing official like DMV uniforms. And they've all got like billy clubs with them.
Nathan ("Stump"):They got jobs.
Corey (DM):Exactly. And they begin to run with those no mowers.
And they start, they get into the clearing and they're like looking around and they see the orb kind of following the mowers and they just begin to shoot past you as they run past you into the grass and heading out after these mowing dads. You see like just kind of this confusion. You just see this wave of people going and chasing them.
You notice the farmer is still just sitting there, just like kind of walks his way back into the cabin, locks the door. And after everything is kind of settled and gone, you look down and you see e. You look down and you see where the dads were.
You see that, you know they've taken their barbecue, it's been knocked over. Stuff's kind of scattered around. But you see a folded up note just laying amidst the stuff that has kind of fallen over.
Nick (E'Louie):Yeah, he, he immediately picks it up.
Corey (DM):As you pick it up, you open it up, you look at this note and you begin to realize it is written in common. And it talks about a meeting of the mowing days ads in two days.
And you see in the whisker lens in tumbill and underneath it it says their time has come. Quest happens is Nick Jackson as Eloi, Lauren Keller as Esmeralda Fitzmonster, Nathan Guidry as Stump and I your dungeon master, Corey Keller.
Catch us every other Thursday as a new episode drops and we'll see you in the next adventure.
